Profile for addickted:
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- a member for 5 years, 5 months and 5 days
- has posted 1383 messages on the main board
- (of which 4 have appeared on the front page)
- has posted 1 messages on the talk board
- has posted 6 messages on the links board
- (including 1 links)
- has posted 11 stories and 7 replies on question of the week
- They liked 145 pictures, 7 links, 0 talk posts, and 6 qotw answers. [RSS feed]
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ADDICKTED
Recent front page messages:
Best answers to questions:
» The thing I've been most ashamed of doing with a penis
My Ex
had one of those Greek style wedding rings (the type with 3 interwoven bands that move around each other).
Anyhow, one night she was giving me a bit of a hand-shandy, when all of a sudden I felt the most searing pain coming from down below.
The ring had caught my skin in it and with the hand movement, proceeded to rip an inch and a half of skin off of my skin-flute.
It fucking well hurt and bled for a few hours.
I still have the scar =(
(Thu 12th Mar 2009, 14:05, More)
My Ex
had one of those Greek style wedding rings (the type with 3 interwoven bands that move around each other).
Anyhow, one night she was giving me a bit of a hand-shandy, when all of a sudden I felt the most searing pain coming from down below.
The ring had caught my skin in it and with the hand movement, proceeded to rip an inch and a half of skin off of my skin-flute.
It fucking well hurt and bled for a few hours.
I still have the scar =(
(Thu 12th Mar 2009, 14:05, More)
» Dumb things you've done
Don't piss the dog off...
When I was 7 years old. I was perched on the foot of the stairs with 'Prince', the family labrador sat loyally at my feet.
Wondering if dogs feel pain, I took the compass that my irresponsible sister had left lying around and plunged it into Princes' heed.
I can now confirm that dogs do indeed feel pain, but not half as much as I did when the little shitbag bit my hand leaving me with a scar to this very day.
Bastard dog, and I blame my bitch sister for getting me bitten...
(Thu 27th Dec 2007, 13:51, More)
Don't piss the dog off...
When I was 7 years old. I was perched on the foot of the stairs with 'Prince', the family labrador sat loyally at my feet.
Wondering if dogs feel pain, I took the compass that my irresponsible sister had left lying around and plunged it into Princes' heed.
I can now confirm that dogs do indeed feel pain, but not half as much as I did when the little shitbag bit my hand leaving me with a scar to this very day.
Bastard dog, and I blame my bitch sister for getting me bitten...
(Thu 27th Dec 2007, 13:51, More)
» Racist grandparents
My ex brother-in-law was in the Army...
One day his troop were parading in front of Prince Phillip. My ex BIL was at the very end of the line and 4 or 5 soldiers up from him was a black solider.
Prince Phillip gets to the end of the line and leans in to the Sergeant and within earshot of my ex BIL says:
"Very good, very good. I'm just not sure on the fuzzy-wuzzy though".
(Thu 27th Oct 2011, 12:38, More)
My ex brother-in-law was in the Army...
One day his troop were parading in front of Prince Phillip. My ex BIL was at the very end of the line and 4 or 5 soldiers up from him was a black solider.
Prince Phillip gets to the end of the line and leans in to the Sergeant and within earshot of my ex BIL says:
"Very good, very good. I'm just not sure on the fuzzy-wuzzy though".
(Thu 27th Oct 2011, 12:38, More)
» Ginger
I have ginger sideburns. Nothing else, just my sideboards.
Because of this strange hair anomaly, my pal calls me Fish Fingers.
It also means that any future offspring that born unto to the ginger gene, will be placed in a Hessian sack weighted down with large rocks and tossed into the Thames...
(Thu 25th Feb 2010, 21:35, More)
I have ginger sideburns. Nothing else, just my sideboards.
Because of this strange hair anomaly, my pal calls me Fish Fingers.
It also means that any future offspring that born unto to the ginger gene, will be placed in a Hessian sack weighted down with large rocks and tossed into the Thames...
(Thu 25th Feb 2010, 21:35, More)
» Asking people out
In my mid 20's...
I was successfully chatting this right sort up in a bar in London's West End. I was there for my mates Birthday, but took the opportunity to go after this 1 lovely looking lady.
Anyhow. I offered her a drink, she accepted, so off to the bar I went where I bumped in to the birthday boy. 20 minutes and several shots later and me now feeling extremely pissed, I made my way back to where I'd left the lovely.
There she was! Still waiting! Result! Except... there were 2 of her?!
Identical twins? Very similar looking bestest pals? Anyway, cue what felt like an eternity of me standing there trying to work out which one I'd been chatting up. So I had a 50/50 chance of getting it right. I gambled. "Here you go love", and handed the drink to the wrong one...
The drink came back rather quickly... in my face... gutted...
(Thu 10th Dec 2009, 16:50, More)
In my mid 20's...
I was successfully chatting this right sort up in a bar in London's West End. I was there for my mates Birthday, but took the opportunity to go after this 1 lovely looking lady.
Anyhow. I offered her a drink, she accepted, so off to the bar I went where I bumped in to the birthday boy. 20 minutes and several shots later and me now feeling extremely pissed, I made my way back to where I'd left the lovely.
There she was! Still waiting! Result! Except... there were 2 of her?!
Identical twins? Very similar looking bestest pals? Anyway, cue what felt like an eternity of me standing there trying to work out which one I'd been chatting up. So I had a 50/50 chance of getting it right. I gambled. "Here you go love", and handed the drink to the wrong one...
The drink came back rather quickly... in my face... gutted...
(Thu 10th Dec 2009, 16:50, More)