Profile for joefish:
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- a member for 10 years, 6 months and 21 days
- has posted 4956 messages on the main board
- (of which 2 have appeared on the front page)
- has posted 4 messages on the talk board
- has posted 19 messages on the links board
- (including 1 links)
- has posted 16 stories and 15 replies on question of the week
- They liked 402 pictures, 7 links, 1 talk posts, and 42 qotw answers.
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Recent front page messages:
Best answers to questions:
» Winning
How to piss off the English department.
I once won a prize for English at school. A bloody book token. Great.
I think it was the result of a book report, where we were given a small blank exercise book and had to fill it with a summary or review
of the story, and I crafted a crude pop-up book. It was on 'Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH', and being a creative sort I'd lifted a load of illustrations from the promotional material for the Don Bluth animated adaptation.
Anyway, the prize was a book token. We had to choose a book, buy it, and return it to the school for a grand presentation. Come the parents' evening, I was sick with a headache so my brother picked it up for me.
From then onwards, I was subject to derision and abuse from my barking mad, Victorian-attitude English teacher, and I had no idea why.
It was only much later that I realised that the deluded staff honestly thought they were instilling a love of literature in their students, and my choice of 'The Complete Spectrum ROM Disassembly' as a literature prize rather tactlessly highlighted their failings. It was apparently referred to as 'not even a proper book'; Doctors Ian Logan and Frank O'Hara apparently not on the department's list of acceptably tedious and departed authors.
(Fri 29th Apr 2011, 14:58, More)
How to piss off the English department.
I once won a prize for English at school. A bloody book token. Great.
I think it was the result of a book report, where we were given a small blank exercise book and had to fill it with a summary or review
of the story, and I crafted a crude pop-up book. It was on 'Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH', and being a creative sort I'd lifted a load of illustrations from the promotional material for the Don Bluth animated adaptation.
Anyway, the prize was a book token. We had to choose a book, buy it, and return it to the school for a grand presentation. Come the parents' evening, I was sick with a headache so my brother picked it up for me.
From then onwards, I was subject to derision and abuse from my barking mad, Victorian-attitude English teacher, and I had no idea why.
It was only much later that I realised that the deluded staff honestly thought they were instilling a love of literature in their students, and my choice of 'The Complete Spectrum ROM Disassembly' as a literature prize rather tactlessly highlighted their failings. It was apparently referred to as 'not even a proper book'; Doctors Ian Logan and Frank O'Hara apparently not on the department's list of acceptably tedious and departed authors.
(Fri 29th Apr 2011, 14:58, More)
» The B3TA Detective Agency
Psychedelic Science
I remember as a wee nipper seeing an exhibit in the Science Museum. It consisted of a white tiled piece of wall with black raised lines that resembled the stained glass window of a church, showing the Madonna and child, but completely colourless.
There was then a small round window in front of it that you could look through, and you'd see the image in startling, brilliant colour. There was also a knob below it that you could turn, and make the colours change.
This had stuck in my head for years as some sort of magic window into another dimension. And it was only decades later that I figured out how it was done. And I'd love to see it done again.
You project two bright colour images, one the exact colour inversion of the other, onto the same screen so that when combined, they appear white. The thick black lines, already on the screen, mask any fringing at the edges. One projector has vertical, the other horizontal, polarisation. You then look at it through a polarising filter, which you can rotate to alternate the colours.
(Thu 13th Oct 2011, 19:51, More)
Psychedelic Science
I remember as a wee nipper seeing an exhibit in the Science Museum. It consisted of a white tiled piece of wall with black raised lines that resembled the stained glass window of a church, showing the Madonna and child, but completely colourless.
There was then a small round window in front of it that you could look through, and you'd see the image in startling, brilliant colour. There was also a knob below it that you could turn, and make the colours change.
This had stuck in my head for years as some sort of magic window into another dimension. And it was only decades later that I figured out how it was done. And I'd love to see it done again.
You project two bright colour images, one the exact colour inversion of the other, onto the same screen so that when combined, they appear white. The thick black lines, already on the screen, mask any fringing at the edges. One projector has vertical, the other horizontal, polarisation. You then look at it through a polarising filter, which you can rotate to alternate the colours.
(Thu 13th Oct 2011, 19:51, More)
» Irrational Hatred
Adults who complain loudly about something they've sat and watched on TV.
Turn it off!
Change the channel!
Don't be such an utter irredeemable moron!
(Thu 31st Mar 2011, 14:47, More)
Adults who complain loudly about something they've sat and watched on TV.
Turn it off!
Change the channel!
Don't be such an utter irredeemable moron!
(Thu 31st Mar 2011, 14:47, More)
» Irrational Hatred
People who say or write 'Legos'
Not 'Lego' or 'Lego bricks'. Agh. Gun them down with hammers. Or something.
And if you think that's not irrational enough for this QOTW, you haven't seen quite how sharp I would want the hammers to be. And you're now as equally annoying as people who say 'Legos'.
(Thu 31st Mar 2011, 16:06, More)
People who say or write 'Legos'
Not 'Lego' or 'Lego bricks'. Agh. Gun them down with hammers. Or something.
And if you think that's not irrational enough for this QOTW, you haven't seen quite how sharp I would want the hammers to be. And you're now as equally annoying as people who say 'Legos'.
(Thu 31st Mar 2011, 16:06, More)