» Conspicuous Consumption

I was a poor student
I still bought a tin of Heinz Beans though. The ones with little sausages in them.
(Tue 2nd Aug 2011, 19:04, More)

» Kids say the shittiest things

Missing ex
After breaking up with a long-distant ex I attended some sort of family gathering, My nephew saw me and asked where Sarah (for that was her name) was.

“She’s not going to be around any more” I replied.

After a short pause my nephew asked “Is she dead?”.

Bless him. How did he know she was in the boot of my car?
(Fri 24th May 2013, 15:07, More)

» Worst Person for the Job

It would have to be me
I wrote an IF statement the other day and forgot to bracket off some variables when using an OR condition. Oh how we laughed about that one!
(Fri 7th Sep 2012, 16:23, More)

» Churches, temples and holy places

Sorry Grandad
A few years back, my grandad passed on and we all met up at his house before the funeral. My aunt made the mistake of mentioning which particular passage from the bible was being read at the service in advance.

Cut to the service. My brother and I are listening to the sermon more intently than we ever have done before. Waiting.

"Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy."

* Snigger *

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. "

* Smirk *

"Blessed are the peacemakers, ..."

Some people probably think it was inappropriate to be laughing at my grandad's funeral but he was always up for a laugh so I doubt he took too much offence....
(Thu 1st Sep 2011, 15:28, More)