NEWSLETTER: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MF DOOM
This Week:
* RAND - Objectivist film reviews
* AUSTERITY - as a board game
* FRIENDS - all at the same time & place
-------------------------------------------------
________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "Ever notice our
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | issue numbers have
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| started counting DOWN?"
B3ta email 648 - 9 Jan 2015
Listen to this issue via telegraph dots & dashes:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue648
Sub : [email protected]
Snub : [email protected]
-------------------------------------------------
: SPONSORED LINK
"I love Nigel Farage" Pillowcase
With heavy regret we're suggesting you buy this
horrible pillowcase, but imagine sleeping on
it? Waking up next to that face? We reckon
there's an article in that. WRITE IT!
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00K59FJ6...
Or perhaps Pat Butcher with her breasts exposed?
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00F4ZENO...
>> Sponsor B3ta <<
Want this space? Then talk to us.
http://b3ta.com/mailus/
-------------------------------------------------
: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
Crabs, dogs and
>> Crab Vs Goby <<
"The struggles of my little hermit crab with a
grumpy goby," writes stevierar. "I got a new
camera, wanted to test it and am in a silly
mood."
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1261915/
>> Back to work dog <<
"Thought I'd let my dog describe the feeling,
through the medium of 'dog'," groans
DefyingDarwin
http://www.b3ta.com/links/so_its_back_to_work
>> A trip through Mandy comic, 1972 <<
Vintage comics specifically written for girls
are an amazing way of looking back at social
norms of the past. Who are the heroes? Who are
the villains? Spoiler: Most of them are ponies.
(Thanks to reviewer Ambegris)
http://goo.gl/pCfH0h
-------------------------------------------------
: USVSTH3M STUFF
It's politics this week
* The 13 best insults tweeted to Labour - what
a brilliant new vote-winning strategy: pissing
off the entire arts community!
http://usvsth3m.com/post/the-13-best-insults-tweet...
* Labour Party Press Team Tweet Generator -
Need to rush our a weak-kneed rebuttal in a
hurry? We've done the hard work for you.
http://community.usvsth3m.com/generator/labour-par...#
* Jeremy Hunt's Realistic A&E Crisis Simulator
- How long can you last before YOU'RE
privatised?
http://games.usvsth3m.com/jeremy-hunts-realistic-a...
* Austerity! The board game - it's a more
realistic version of Monopoly. Download, print
and play!
http://usvsth3m.com/post/austerity-the-board-game
-------------------------------------------------
: SITES IN BRIEF
Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates
>> How many days in a week? <<
Bodybuilders' guide to intellectual discussion
and then it goes a bit downhill.
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php
>> Nazi cows <<
The Independent runs a story completely
indistinguishable from The Onion - still,
amazing headline.
http://goo.gl/rhGRqO
>> After One Year Of Atheism... <<
Former Pastor: "I Don't Think God Exists"'
http://www.npr.org/2014/12/27/373298310/after-year...
>> Ayn Rand reviews films <<
"Bambi: The biggest and the strongest are the
fittest to rule. This is the way things have
always been — four stars."
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/ayn-ra...
-------------------------------------------------
: BOOK REVIEW
Double penis man writes a book
Last year 'Double Dick Dude' was interviewed on
Reddit about having two penises. This story
went huge and now there's a book - promoted on
The BBC and all sorts of mainstream media
organisations. So we read it and erm...
We have to wonder how many of these people
*actually* read it. There's some pretty fierce
stuff to cover on, say, BBC Newsbeat. Not
saying it's not interesting or entertaining, it
is, but it's also hardly safe sex.
He talks about sex with over 1,000 people
without using protection and spends a long time
describing how he enjoyed giving a woman a
prolapse by penetrating her cervix. Anyway,
strong stuff. Oh, and the fisting, and
resulting rectal prolapse.
TLDR: Prolapse.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00R8A2HV...
-------------------------------------------------
: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
Like TV but, you know, with buttons
* 10 hours of a zooming fractal video. Might be
useful if you haven't discovered MDMA yet.
http://youtu.be/u9VMfdG873E
* Every episode of "Friends" sitcom - played
all at once. On the same screen. Might be
useful if you haven't discovered MDMA yet.
http://youtu.be/6MbJi0xtnEA
* Magnificent strutting on the USS Enterprise.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/LETS_STRUT
------------------------------------------------
: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
Results from the 'Starfish' challenge
Last week we asked for your images of Asteroidea.
Your favourites included:
* WWF: A cheeky Panda reversal (inexpressible)
http://b3ta.com/board/11127239
* CENSORS: sparing our seaside blushes (monkeon)
http://b3ta.com/board/11126486
* ERIC AND ERN: bringing the sunshine (Dead
Pixels)
http://b3ta.com/board/11126781
All these images, and a load more can be found
here:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/starfish/popular/
>> New challenge: Extract a character <
This week we want you to remove someone from a
famous album cover or movie poster and put them
in a new and chucklesome situation.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/extractcharacters/
-------------------------------------------------
: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
* Remember Dan Bull / B3tan Housewife? Turns out
he's going through a really hard time at the
moment. Get well soon, Dan!
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1261979
------------------------------------------------
: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE
Make something cool and tell us about it. If
you are in it then people will see your stuff.
Things we'd really like to see include
* MAKE SOME SEMIAQUATIC MAMMAL FIGURINES - give
them away. Call it a 'pottery ottery lottery'
* LENNON CHALLENGE - JOHN LENNON ONCE WANKED 9
TIMES IN ONE DAY - we nominate YOU to beat him
and upload the film to youtube OR give 50p to
Amnesty.
* PAUL WELLER BIOGRAPHIES - maybe call it 'Jammy
Git'. The second autobiography should be called
"Weller Weller Weller Ooh Tell Me More"
Send contributions via the mail form.
http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/
BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't
been featured then don't be put off - we look
at everything you send us.
-------------------------------------------------
YAY: [email protected]
NAY: [email protected]
-------------------------------------------------
Follow @b3ta on Twitter and win a leopard:
https://twitter.com/b3ta
-------------------------------------------------
THANKS:
This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David
Stevenson. Stuff sent in by CharlieHebdo, A Rory
Borealis, Mudface, tubaman, Jimbotfu, mr.dogshit
& tubaman. Image challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike
Trinder is QOTW bloke.
Top tip via Just a vagabond.
-------------------------------------------------
TOP TIP:
Ensure people know you support a political cause
by updating your Facebook status.
