Feel free to save this for usage when I am not around.

( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:53, archived)

TOAP?

( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:54, archived)

toast on a penis.

( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

NO TOAP ON THE FAQ

( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

Rofl RECTIFY.

( Ttssattsr Hurry, potato delicious., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

lol TTSSATTSR

( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

*drowns in Calpol* *sobs*

( Ttssattsr Hurry, potato delicious., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

*rescues*
aw man, now we're all wet and sticky and... together.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:59, archived)

I'm also naked!

( Ttssattsr Hurry, potato delicious., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:00, archived)

*struggles for a bit*
me too!
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:05, archived)

Pics?

( Stephen_Seagul, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:05, archived)

EVERYWHERE.

( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:11, archived)

yay!

( Stephen_Seagul, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:12, archived)

UNGGGGGGGGGGG *spurt*

( Ttssattsr Hurry, potato delicious., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:07, archived)

I actually disagree with some of this.
Sorry. :P
( Mushroom, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

but does the rest of the board?
This is meant to keep people from being flamed.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

i disagree with YOU*



_{*lies....you seem a nice chap...spiffing animations as well!}
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:59, archived)

haha thanks :D
I try.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:00, archived)

The board's gotten arsey about certain things it doesn't need to get arsey about
Take thread deleting: why the hell is that such a bad thing? If a giant and in-depth conversation had sprung up then yes, I could see a problem with it, but a newbie deleting one of their threads when it's only full of people calling them a cunt... I don't see why that's a problem. If we weren't meant to be able to delete threads, we wouldn't have the ability to.

Also there is nothing in the FAQ about text only threads being banned on /board. It rightly suggests using /talk if it's just general chat, but if a text-only post is relevant to /board then it should be allowed.

Just my jaded oldbie tuppence, there. ;)
( Mushroom, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:00, archived)

I AGREE WITH THE MAN IN THE CORNER

( GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:02, archived)

That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
( Mushroom, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:04, archived)

put your jaded old tuppence away
you filthy whore
( Spunky McPunk http://facebook.com/despondentrock <--my band!!, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:02, archived)

:D

( Mushroom, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:04, archived)

I agree , there's too much of this boardnazi shit going on.

( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:07, archived)

^this
but it also does not say "dont post pictures in /talk", yet html code is disabled

therefore you should not be able to post new threads, containing just text, on the main board
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:07, archived)

then rob wouldn't post
he always starts new threads without images (:
( Spunky McPunk http://facebook.com/despondentrock <--my band!!, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:09, archived)

haha
i'll pull him up on that next time!
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:18, archived)

LOGIC ERROR

( - D - Let it Beard, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:15, archived)

horse shit

( rob twitter.com/robmanuel is following you, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:23, archived)

you appear to me in a combative mood today
just sick of board nazis?
( boris the spider West, in that sort of thing is not., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:24, archived)

no - it's same old same old
but I'm amused by the crap logic of "if X happens here then the opposite must be true for Y"
( rob twitter.com/robmanuel is following you, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:28, archived)

yup
im chatting out my arse

fair enough...

...however...are you ALWAYS here, watching over us, or are you just checking we haven't burnt the place down again?
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:35, archived)

hahaha
'lo rob
( Mushroom, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:25, archived)

ahhhh the voice of reason!
*thumbs up*
( Zank Frappa i might be a cunt but im not a fucking cunt, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:32, archived)

hahaha
nice edit ;)
( Mushroom, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:33, archived)

love is the law!
*lubes*
( spacefish portable wetnork graphic, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:58, archived)

haha

yes..but as a rule it's quite good for a n00b to look over and get the jist
of how to not get himself/herself a new arsehole torn :)
( prodigy69 's World of Stuff, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:57, archived)

Except for good links being for /talk and not /links,
they're not to be wasted
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

meh, a mere sub-rule
and mainly one that only applies to rnuk.

Given time, they will learn the exceptions.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

It applies to everyone except you and SickRik

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

tehe.
Cartoon hexy said "rectify"
( Stephen_Seagul, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

he's on the warpath
but i like :)
( charlie?, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

*claps*
AND IF YOU FAIL AT THIS WE WILL GIVE YOU THE CLAP
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:55, archived)

*tries to clap*
*misses hands*
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:57, archived)

You should have made this 55KB
for a laugh, like.
( Barbarossa Barbarossa Barbarossa Barbarossa Barbarossa, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

But....
"if you are posting a toap".
"Make sure it is so damn funny, no-one notices the fact you put text on."
( Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

Why do you insist on being so cunty? there's really no need
new people make mistakes, that's life. there's no need to drag it out over new threads just because someone's pissed you off

I have also save that and will insert my own text at somepoint =)
( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:56, archived)

This ^ A little

( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:58, archived)

I understand, but if there's a way to prevent these mistakes from being made, it's probably a good thing.
B3ta instructs people to read the FAQ, but it is a mammoth thing that does actually say you can do things that people will still rip you a new arsehole over. This is more an unofficial guide to the main points to avoid.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:01, archived)

But is flaming at people and shouting at them for tiny mistakes
Worht acrrying over into a new thread
Surely you are just as bad as them by doing it
THis could have gone in an existing thread tbh

/being pedantic blog
( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:06, archived)

I took time doing this :(
My hand aches :(

And this isn't shouting or flaming, it's simply explanatory and concise. No?
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:13, archived)

I think you've just been bitch-slapped by the boss

( boris the spider West, in that sort of thing is not., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:14, archived)

It may be consice and to the point
but so is the FAQ (the board bit)
im just being an arse...
( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:16, archived)

I think the point was more that while it may be a concise guide,
because it is posted on the /board it is only really going to be read by regulars and not by the actual new people and thus is more a cathartic exhortation of your own rage which is pushing other stuff down.
(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:07, archived)

correct and to the point.

( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:10, archived)

Hopefully text I can read without having to press my irises up to the glass of my monitor and suffering severe ocular burns.

(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:01, archived)

I'll try my best , just for you

( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:05, archived)

just to clarify my position on this
clarification indeed
( GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:57, archived)

You have your jim-jams on.
*runs from impending martial art-ery*
( Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:59, archived)

Jim Jams and body armour
and a 40 inch bit of wood to hit you with
( GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:00, archived)

Eeep!

( Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:01, archived)

slumber-party-thumbs-up?

( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:01, archived)

YES!

( GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:03, archived)

...
Hello new person. Please read our FAQ. Cheers.
( Spunky McPunk http://facebook.com/despondentrock <--my band!!, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:57, archived)

wheres the horses
:(
( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 17:58, archived)

fix'd

( Spunky McPunk http://facebook.com/despondentrock <--my band!!, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:00, archived)

:D

( epiphany coming live from Umeå, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:07, archived)

pfffft

( charlie?, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:03, archived)

maybe it's my old age
but I'm not too fussed about the rules (man) ... it's irking when someone's being a cunt - but they're normally trying to be a cunt so they're not going to stop. Learners will learn about the conventions eventually and they should be encouraged more than they are.

*sings*

I believe the n00bs are our future....
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:00, archived)

understandable. But there are people that are (me included sometimes)
so a nice, easy to read comic-book format guide to the main things to avoid was, I thought, a rather helpful thing to produce, so people can be presented with it in case of a breach instead of unhelpful insults.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:04, archived)

good point
but see if I see this ... all the fucking time, and you're waving it around like a kid with his cock in his hand any time a new person shows the slightest sign of weakness - we're going to have words and the words will be 'HEXY YOU WANKER - OOootside NOW!'
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:07, archived)

heehee, okay. I shall gaz it to them.
:D
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:12, archived)

yes, I agree.
too many people seem to think that bullying new people is par for the course and acceptable. I find that it just alienates people who have made genuine mistakes.
( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:04, archived)

I for one welcome our new noncey overlord...
i read somewhere that you were a nonce, i don't realy think you are a nonce - i think i should stop typing now. I'll stop typing after I close these tags.
( Elvis of Nazareth This isn't a sig, it's a fucking liberty., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:04, archived)

did you know
that if you don't close tags, b3ta closes them for you?

Watch...

I just opened a tag (ooh, that didn't work, it just made things smaller instead of typing . oh dammit. ANYWY YES, I'M NOT GOING TO CLOSE ANY OF THESE AND WATCH...
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:09, archived)

nooo!! you'll make everything below this post smaller as well!!
( Elvis of Nazareth This isn't a sig, it's a fucking liberty., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:13, archived)

wrong
nothing wrong with TOAP

A good joke requires no technical ability whatsoever, and is vastly more worthy than some piccy that is laboured over but a bit crap.

EDIT: And, as others say, you're a nonce.

edit: I also disagree with basically everything you say.

The only rule is "be funny or interesting". Which can't be turned into a series of only do X here, only Y here.
( rob twitter.com/robmanuel is following you, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:12, archived)

^ some of this
i like very good TOAP every now and again.


( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:18, archived)

OI YOU!
www.b3ta.com/board/8434921

;-)
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:21, archived)

you remind me actually
of the times that someone starts a new thread with just text and someone helpfully calls them a cunt and tells them to go and check the faq and then puts them on ignore anyway -- if they checked the faq i believe they'd find something about how it's best not to start a new thread with just text, but nothing that actually says not to do it...

also i'm reminded of a time some brainless fuckwit who will remain nameless decided to hurl abuse at me and tell me to go to the faq because... err... i linked a post that was nsfw. stupid bitch.
( boris the spider West, in that sort of thing is not., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:24, archived)

me?

( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:26, archived)

eh?
no, i didn't mean you're a stupid bitch! i've nothing against you at all. just ruminating on naziism and all that -- absolutely nothing personal intended!
( boris the spider West, in that sort of thing is not., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:27, archived)

then please
continue :-)
( Sir T. Skellington, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:36, archived)

i think i've said my bit, really
:)
( boris the spider West, in that sort of thing is not., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:37, archived)

This caused me to laugh
:D

edit: the nonce bit, not the other bit
( discomeats lives like a windrammer!, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:22, archived)

Fair enough.
This won't stop people getting angry though. This isn't a definitive guide to the rules... the FAQ is that. But there are things that aren't in the FAQ that still get regulars really angry. This is a guide to THOSE things.
( hexachordal la la la la la, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:24, archived)

it's just dogma
and posting this when people break "the rules" isn't going to stop people getting angry

it'll just rile people
( rob twitter.com/robmanuel is following you, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:27, archived)

any chance of a new image challenge this week?
just curious :)
( The Great Architect, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:50, archived)

tomorrow morning
we were all sent out of whack for ob reasons, but I've spoken to Fraser and we decided it was better to stick it up in the morning that at midnight
( rob twitter.com/robmanuel is following you, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:53, archived)

cheers fella, and thanks for all your hard work getting things back up and running this week

( The Great Architect, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 19:30, archived)

i think that you meant "some regulars"
there are plenty of regulars who aren't pedantic bullys who don't thrive on berating new members.....
but then again, sadly, there are plenty who are
( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:29, archived)

i disagree with your 3rd point
" View older messages "
( Zank Frappa i might be a cunt but im not a fucking cunt, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:15, archived)

SO DO I
G'day spunkrat
( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:17, archived)

owyegoinyerflamingalah?
the beers hot, the snags are cold and the missus is trying to suckstart the victa
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!
( Zank Frappa i might be a cunt but im not a fucking cunt, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:28, archived)

can I put my prawn on yer barbie?

( Cockweasle, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:31, archived)

course ya can
but not until Ding goes!
( Zank Frappa i might be a cunt but im not a fucking cunt, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:35, archived)

also
i thought the reason people got apoplexy over thread deletions wasn't so much the deletion of all the witty and helpful repartee but was more because a new post pushes one off the board but a deletion doesn't bring it back.

fuck the witty repartee. i can live without seeing a million people posting 250k fail images.
( boris the spider West, in that sort of thing is not., Thu 5 Jun 2008, 18:20, archived)

Shouldn't this say...
PRINT-out-and-keep?
/pedantry
( LeightonJimbo is proud to be a b3tan, Thu 5 Jun 2008, 19:56, archived)