Keira Knightley in 2020


From the Fat Britain challenge. See all 261 entries (closed)

( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:37, archived)

still would
might give her some tits as well
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:39, archived)

ahaha yeh

( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:39, archived)

Obligatory
Can you milk it?
(SockCooker Sock FTW 2012, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:41, archived)

I'm afraid not...
she undergoes a double mastectomy in 2015.

:(
( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:42, archived)

But you can still
fuck the scars, right?
(bennyhillslovechild A walking jam-jar and syringe, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:42, archived)

zomg
i'd give it a go.
( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:44, archived)

Ooh, can you tell us who wins the Gran National or something?
Or kill all our fathers, possibly
(SockCooker Sock FTW 2012, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:43, archived)

Yes...
but it will cost 28 pence.
( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:47, archived)

Old Mrs. Trebucket from the Post Office
96 years old, and can go from 0 to 1 mph in just over a minute.
she had a bit of trouble at the water jump, but her flotation colostomy bag saved her.
(coobeastie I wish I was in Greenall Whitley Land, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:47, archived)

Mrs. Trebucket
Killed my father?*

\o/

*also available on DVD
(SockCooker Sock FTW 2012, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:50, archived)

Aleister Crowley knew my father,
or rather,
Business once took Dad up into the glens,
Where in a small hotel bar Crowley asked:
“Have you got change for the fruit machine chief, I’m all out?”
(coobeastie I wish I was in Greenall Whitley Land, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:55, archived)

How old's your dad? Aleister Crowley died over 60 years ago

( Cockweasle http://b3nn3tt.mybrute.com, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:09, archived)

what has keria knightly got to loose?
jesus, you'd expect her to scratch them all the time. They're no bigger than mozzie bites.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:44, archived)

true...
...her career?...nah she lost that after teh pirates do a carribean.
( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:46, archived)

*gets horn*
*goes for cold shower*

(I think I was scared by a large breasticle when young)
(SockCooker Sock FTW 2012, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:46, archived)

lol
breasticle.
( PointlessCamel Last one on drugs is a queer., Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:47, archived)

It's Anne Diamond!

( Mystery_Bob, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:52, archived)

OH MY GOD. SOURCE IS PAULINE QUIRKE RIGHT?
BECAUSE IF SO, SOMEWHERE IN A CUPBOARD UPSTAIRS, I TOTALLY HAVE A SIGNED COPY OF THIS PICTURE.

/won a Snow Princess competition in a nearby shopping centre and was crowned by Pauline Quirke blog.
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 1:59, archived)

She lives near me.
The stupid terrible actress.
(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:02, archived)

She's ace.
We ate vol au vents together and she gave me a squishy hug.
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:03, archived)

She was just trying to absorb your nucleaic acid chains.

(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:10, archived)

hahahahahaha Snow princess competition.
I was an ugly sister in Cinderella in primary 3
( Cockweasle http://b3nn3tt.mybrute.com, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:11, archived)

Ahahaha, all I can imagine is a two dimensional drawing constantly swearing at the children.

(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:15, archived)

I WAS A CHILD

( Cockweasle http://b3nn3tt.mybrute.com, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:19, archived)

A CHILD WITH SNARNS

( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:22, archived)

I was a good child.

( Cockweasle http://b3nn3tt.mybrute.com, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:23, archived)

You were my child.

( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:25, archived)

I wish I could go back and be less of a shit child.
I swear I can get away with nearly anything now, if only I knew that then. IF ONLY!

Although if that happened then I'd never learn to not be a shit child and gain the knowledge to not be shit to go back with, at which point I'd probably pubesce into a paradox or something.
(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:25, archived)

Pubesce is not a word.
I would still like to see that though.
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:27, archived)

I frequently make up words, although mainly if there is no word there and it's a variation or construct which should exist.
If you google search the word nomenclatively I am the very bottom search result! A word which apparantly doesn't exist, but there is no reason why it shouldn't.
(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:30, archived)

Hahahaha
You need to shop a monocle and tophat into that really.
(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:35, archived)

Oh , I was tempted
In fact, I still dress like that now
( Cockweasle http://b3nn3tt.mybrute.com, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:37, archived)

Hahaha awwwwwwww baby Cockweasle!
Is that a waistcoat??
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:41, archived)

Of course.

( Cockweasle http://b3nn3tt.mybrute.com, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:45, archived)

I officially love your parents.
:)
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:46, archived)

But the four gold things aren't buttons.
Those are markings, as he was frequently used as a substitute die in craps games.
(Jeru War and Piss, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:47, archived)

I was Happy
the dwarf in snow white at my prep school. On the first night, in front of all the parents, Just before curtain, Grumpy shoved me in a gap at the rear of the stage and him and dopey held me down there until places were called. As the curtain opened all folk could see was me jumping out of the rear of the stage like some maniacal jack in the box then run over to Grumpy and slap him. Don't laugh, I was only about 9.
( Pasanonic so I compo anything with words, right?, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:16, archived)

Awwww!
It's so ironic ^_^
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:20, archived)

I'm pretty sure I only won because they thought I was adorably weird.
Presenter:"Do you have any pets?"
Me:"Yes, two Giant African Land Snails called Barbie and Ken"

Presenter:"What's your favourite movie and why?"
Me:"The Land Before Time because dinosaurs are cool."

At this point I looked all goofy as well, plus my nose was even more Ridiculously tiny than it is these days.
( Face will put on her red shoes and nrans the blues, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:17, archived)

That's just a pictire of Eamonn Holmes

(clut, Fri 4 Jul 2008, 2:22, archived)