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[challenge entry] BEHOLD: Glory in my magnificent new fire fighting invention


This doesn't really qualify as COMPLETELY FUCKING USELESS SHIT because it is the best fire fighting device yet invented.

Discard After Use? Not any more, this is a fire fighting device you can eat.

Also available Fire Turkeys, for the larger Kitchen Fire.

From the Completely fucking useless shit challenge. See all 411 entries (closed)

(Obamanable Snowman, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:15, archived)
# There's never a fire chicken around when you need one
(I helped save b3ta! Joliet, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:16, archived)
# I would hesitate to suggest that this is actually a BRILLIANT idea.
The marketing could be an issue, however.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:18, archived)
# I see it in some sort of cape.
Reg Holdsworth screaming about how amazing it is.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:19, archived)
# You've caught me out again
with a Pop Culture reference I had to google for enlightenment.

Does he scream about amazing things much, then?
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:21, archived)
# Safestyle Windows and Doors.
*says she in a fairly brainwashed manner*

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:22, archived)
# *is no wiser for the info*
The only thing I know about Coronation Street is that I always wanted to look after the cat in the opening titles, because he looked really sad and cold.

Oh dear, I really have said too much now.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:25, archived)
# I wanted to do that too!
I always wanted to go to a filming when I was little (because of course, they film the credits EACH AND EVERY TIME) and give him some milk and fishy.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:27, archived)
# hahahah, that is a BRILLIANT idea :D
I suppose the company that manufactures that could also make Cow floatation devices for boats, and Salmon glass brakers for escaping trains etc :D
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:21, archived)
# Yes, yes
And they'd have the world rights to Emergency Ham.

Please b3ta can we make this happen? Get your people on the phone.
(Obamanable Snowman, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:24, archived)
# Excellent!
Rather a short shelf-life, I fear, but excellent none-the-less :)

Do they come in free range variety?

(I helped save b3ta! i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:23, archived)
# ahaha
you see, you've spotted the genius of this invention.

Guaranteed revenue stream - you'd have to buy a new chicken every few days.
(Obamanable Snowman, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:26, archived)
# hehehehe!
(I helped save b3ta! god save the queen making another unremarkable comeback, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:25, archived)
# haha
this product appeals to me
(I helped save b3ta! Bobby Bob Bob also available on http://jbobw.deviantart.com/, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:26, archived)
# Where can I order it?
Brilliant 8)!
(arcticmagnolia, Fri 16 Jan 2009, 10:40, archived)