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Home » Messageboard » Portents of the apocalypse » Message 916245

[challenge entry] ooh, have you seen the news.......

From the Portents of the apocalypse challenge. See all 399 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! Dai_Marzipan Ain't no party like an S Club party, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:30, archived)
# no I'm still at work
what have I missed
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:32, archived)
# Well best mate
won the gold cup and I lost £40, hahahha
(I helped save b3ta! Dai_Marzipan Ain't no party like an S Club party, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:33, archived)
# Equine Friends?
or was he the jockey
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:45, archived)
# Isn't that
what they tried to do for the Millenium ;)
(I helped save b3ta! sp3ktor - no,.. I don't know either, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:33, archived)
# Nah, it's what various Industrial companies
have been doing for years...

Waaa! I don't want to write my CV!
(I helped save b3ta! Lethe is carrying a spade. SPANG., Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:38, archived)
# writing your CV is scary..
..especially if you havn't updated in years.
just wait until you have to do a cover letter, then the fear really starts to set in
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:45, archived)
# I've never
even had a CV.
(I helped save b3ta! Penile, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:46, archived)
# I haven't updated it since
before uni, and I can't find the blasted thing
Plus I have to write a personal statement!

Bugger!
(I helped save b3ta! Lethe is carrying a spade. SPANG., Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:46, archived)
# Don't update!
Re-write!
You'll produce something that's more concise, more up-to-date, and you can adjust it so it's specific to the position you're applying to.
Good God, I sound like someone down the Job Centre...
(kryptik, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 19:04, archived)
# I'm with you though.
Also, most recent stuff first - I saw a mate's CV recently and by putting her education history at the top she was effectively making them wade through what she got in her GCSEs before bothering to tell them that she'd been doing this really scary big responsible job for the past five months.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 19:09, archived)
# Aarrrggggghhhhh
The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear The Fear

*Oopps!* Sorry

MORNING ALL!
(I helped save b3ta! K3rry, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:48, archived)
# evening
morning
Good Whenever
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:49, archived)
# Good Day!
How you been keeping?
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:52, archived)
# Very well thanks
Cept this week. Been working till 11pm each day but at least I've been getting to meet some of the new day people!
(I helped save b3ta! K3rry, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 19:04, archived)
# Hey up.
I thought there was a bloody cv writing aid on the uni computers, but I appear to be wrong. Argh!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Lethe is carrying a spade. SPANG., Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:52, archived)
# the cover letter is so hard
it's why I only get jobs through agencies.
How are you meant to explain why you are particularly suited for a job, when you know you are not suited to any work on a fundemental level?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:48, archived)
# just say you don't mind making the coffee
and that you'll let the directors bumrape you and you're bound to get it
(I helped save b3ta! evil pixie, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:50, archived)
# I have tried 3 different replies to that
and simply and rarely, I am at a loss what to say.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:58, archived)
# CV?
Pfft. Just apply for jobs where the CEO was at the same college as you at Oxford, surely?
(I helped save b3ta! Baz Fuck off, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:50, archived)
# Doesn't
work when I spent all my uni time calling the hooray henry's twats to their faces, more fool me
(I helped save b3ta! Lethe is carrying a spade. SPANG., Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:53, archived)
# Quite.
(I helped save b3ta! Baz Fuck off, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:57, archived)
# Is that Lava?
Is JUSTHERE here? I want to buy his mini.
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:34, archived)
# are we trading?
can I buy your love?
(I helped save b3ta! zog why change it now?, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:35, archived)
# You've already got it Zog
you know you're my favourite b3tan.
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:39, archived)
# that would be a
cupid stunt
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:40, archived)
# Oh Fnord, so cynical?
Here, have a love cake...
*hands Fnord a cake of Love*
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:41, archived)
# Whats that icing made from?
/suspicious
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:50, archived)
# mmmmmmm
Banana flavoured love cake am de best!
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 19:48, archived)
# you can by my
sense of self worth, it's not worth much
(I helped save b3ta! Roxy_Hart is so so old, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:40, archived)
# Can I buy your inner ear?
I always wanted a spare one of those.
(I helped save b3ta! Lethe is carrying a spade. SPANG., Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:42, archived)
# I always wanted some self worth
will you take scrambles through wallet 23p and a bit of lint?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:44, archived)
# what colour lint?
(I helped save b3ta! Roxy_Hart is so so old, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:45, archived)
# kind of a dirty grey colour
I think it migrated from a trouser pocket
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:49, archived)
# I'll think about it
I really prefer blue lint
(I helped save b3ta! Roxy_Hart is so so old, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:53, archived)
# shame
I can probably rub some up.
gets biro, and starts ineffectively colouring in the lint
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 19:01, archived)
# Oh no
You lot kill me you really do!
Pootle, you should have loads of self worth, you're brill!
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:46, archived)
# you, madam, are far too kind
/little bow & blush
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:50, archived)
# why don't you
leave him a m3ss3g3 so he can get back to you?
(I helped save b3ta! evil pixie, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:37, archived)
# cos it's
borked
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:39, archived)
# fair point
(I helped save b3ta! evil pixie, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:39, archived)
# hah!
Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.
(I helped save b3ta! Banana, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:40, archived)
# i don't have a pipe
i don't even have a bong
i could skin up though, if that would satisfy you?
(I helped save b3ta! evil pixie, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:48, archived)
# Yes please
/passes rizla
work is a tad boring right now
(I helped save b3ta! Penile, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:50, archived)
# Only if you're
rolling with blues.

Reds are like wallpaper.
(I helped save b3ta! Bud Muhnquai Update your profile or fuck off, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:57, archived)
# good point
timely made.
though what happened to the wheat ones, they were good
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pootle, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:59, archived)
# i have about 6 blue left
then its red all the way, i'm afraid
(I helped save b3ta! evil pixie, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:59, archived)
# It's vindaloo day
in the House Of Commons canteen?
(I helped save b3ta! pxyzyzygy, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:41, archived)
# brony ar stomp
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Thu 13 Mar 2003, 18:42, archived)