Spot the Stumpy Dog.
They didn't think it through... "here you go, Moey, get yourself inside this stinking costume and wander about this shopping centre for a few days." so I did. It smelled like the crotch of a thousand unwashed marathon runners mixed with a lorry full of stale lynx deodorant and could so easily have provided an anecdote for last weeks question had I not held my lunch so manfully.

I reluctantly stripped to t-shirt and pants, for we were at the height of summer, and placed my parts where many a sweaty fiend had placed theirs before me. It was obviously never going to work, but they insisted and I crumpled the legs up til my feet poked out the bottom and folded the sleeves numerous times til Spot had forearms like Popeye after a crazed spinach bender.

The chin hung just above my belly and the belly above my knees. The knees were backed up among the calves and ankles and Spot looked for all the world like his legs were styled on Nora Batty's stockings with the whole ensemble akin to how Yoda may have looked had he spent his entire life in a tumble dryer.

I measure a very unimpressive 5'5"; my Spot the dog costume seemed to have been made for that Russian boxing monster with all the back hair. Together we spent the week scaring many a child.
( Moey, Thu 14 Jan 2010, 15:50, 1 reply)

*click*
For the marvellous image of a crumpled, deformed caricature of Spot the Dog scaring the living proverbial out of small kids whilst their parents fail to understand why they don't want to give their favourite fictional doggy a hug...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Jan 2010, 16:27, closed)