Mixer
Not quite Darwin, but fuckin stupid nonetheless...

So Im in the kitchen, mixing something (Angel Delight?) and I get out the electric whisk. I plug it in, put the 2 rotating mixing blades in and wonder what will happen if I pput my fingers in between the blades and turn it on...

The answer is your fingers get pulled in and you call for you wife to help you.

Did a similar thing with the vacuum cleaner the other day; it's a Dyson, so disasembles easily. I had got some string caught round the brush, so decided to fix it. Unplug it, sit down and faff about. I sort it, put it back together and plug it back in to try it. It comes on and makes a noise but I notice it doesnt seem to be sucking stuff up, so I switch off and feel under the front to see if the brush is spinning; no it isnt, so I up end it, give it a wiggle and, WITH MY FINGERS IN THERE, switch it on...

Turns out the brush was spinning after all.
(kitescreech still here, Sat 14 Feb 2009, 8:42, 1 reply)

I nearly lost a finger once.
Was wondering why the 2 stroke motorcycle that was to be my brother's birthday present wasn't starting so stuck my finger in the exhaust port and into the chamber where the piston goes up and down and cranked it.

By the sheerest stroke of luck, the fucker who sold me the engine had sold it without a piston ("It was running last time it was tried". Bob Golner, you deserved to go out of business, you prick) otherwise it would have sheared my finger off in a heartbeat. Of course, if the piston had been there it would probably have started and I wouldn't have put my finger in but you never know.

All I got was a couple of whacks from the con-rod. Not even any bruises.
(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Sat 14 Feb 2009, 20:31, closed)