Death by Paprika Pringles
I almost wish that I HAD died (although I'd have loved to have heard the eulogy...."Here lies Airliebird, he died doing what he loved"), but in retrospect this was very scary:-

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~flashback~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have moved back home at the age of 26, and am going through a messy divorce, when my little sister and i had a bit of an argument. She called me "Big mouth" during the exchange, and we both went off into a huff and didn't talk for an hour or so. Being the olive branch offering kind, I thought it would be a bit of a giggle to prove how big my mouth was by doing my party trick, make my sis laugh and break the tension.

I put a Cheddar biscuit (not a mini one, a full size one mind,) in my mouth and made it do a total 180 degree flip with my tongue. My sis laughed, and said "Ok smartarse, how many of THESE can you fit in there?"

She proffered a large stack of pringles, we counted about 60, and I fitted them in my mouth, and made them flip without losing any, breaking any or salivating on the carpet.

Then I bit down to eat the mouthfull of curvy goodness so I could go for a new record of 70.
Imagine 60 curvy, tasty Pringles shattering into millions of tiny sharp pieces, then imagine my sister pissing herself laughing as my mouth filled up with Pringle dust, and me trying not to choke.
I caught her eye and started to giggle too, and - I'd presume that most of the QOTW readers wouldn't know this - giggling with a mouth full of this stuff means expelling air, and therefore Pringle dust. When one expells air, one must replace it with fresh air, and thats when the trouble started. I inhaled a good quantity of dusty, paprikary needle sharp shards, and began to choke. It was only when I turned blue that my sis decided to stop pissing herself and slap me on the back. Soon the carpet was covered in Paprika Pringle Pastry, my mum was looking down at her blue faced son gasping for breath and my sister had lost control of her lower limbs and was sliding helplessly off the couch mumbling "60, he did 60!"

length? well it was more quantity, but I reckon without laughing I could have done the whole tube!
(airliebird Has now found Twiglets in Sydney!!!!!!! yay!, Sun 15 Feb 2009, 10:02, 1 reply)

like the post
nice one!
(Errin C, Sun 15 Feb 2009, 11:25, closed)