American Breakfast
I once worked at an airport (I won't name it this still mortifies me to this day)anyway it was a small airport with quite limited facilities. I started my shift at a ridiculously early 4am, worse still the night previous had only seemed to have ended a couple of hours previously after a night of lager finished off with a meat based takeaway.

So I work at the bit before security when the passengers are going through to the departure area, at approx 5.30 am a middle aged American couple approached meand i gave them the relevant instructions and information, whilst doing this I couldn't help but let go with a long, warm, silent and very smelly smell. after a pause the man passenger sniffed the air and said to me 'Hey I'm guessing there is a restaurant through there serving breakfast?' then to his wife 'Can you smell that bacon?'.

I blushed furiously and made non-commital facial expressions to the question, ushering him along to the security man. Why?

There was indeed a cafe 'through there' only it didn't open 'til 7am when even then it only sold cold prepacked food and drinks. The lovely aroma of sizzling bacon was the warm air coming from my hungover bowels. I can vouch for this because I was to a point enjoying it too albeit very privately.

By the time my shift was over I was ready for my bed, I did tell the tale to a couple of friends when I next had a drink who saw the funny side but it really did embarrass me.

By the way I am a girl. as for the poor Americans, I always wonder what they ate whilst waiting for their flight, stomach grumbling from the anticipation of a hot bacon butty or whatever they call it in America.
(Thomasina Kitten, Fri 13 Jul 2007, 15:47, Reply)