Come and warm yourself by this roaring candle.
A different type of festival to most of the ones here I think. A few years back my missus and I were involved in a local music festival which, rather than being in a field, was a series of traditional Scottish music concerts in various venues around the area.

The closing night was in a hall at the local distillery, and to make it pretty my wife was asked to make some candles with the festival's logo on (she does that sort of thing as a sideline).

The candles were made, put around the place and lit - I did wonder if the whole place would go up in a fireball as the whisky fumes ignited, but there wasn't a sniff of the stuff in the air - and it was all very atmospheric with the lights dimmed.

The place filled up with all sorts of people, including two coachloads of old folks on a tour. And away we went with the music.

Now this was summertime, and we were on an upper floor, and it was pretty well full, so it was all starting to get rather hot. Like quite a few of the people there, I made a bid for some outside air at the half-time whistle and headed downstairs.

Of course the way was blocked by various members of the Blue-Rinse brigade making their way one step at a time down towards the door. So I got a fine opportunity to overhear two of them wittering on about how hot they were.

"OOoch, it's verra hot in there is it no, Etty?"
"Aye, it is Morag, aye, verra hott"
"Are you no' feelin' that it's hot, Etty?"
"Och aye, it's hot alright, aye, verra hott, aye."
"Ach, it'll be all the candles. They put out a Terrrrrible heat, candles"

A terrible heat?

I wanted to rebrand them as OAP Winter Warmers, but apparently this was bad taste because when I rang the Council to suggest they might fund a distribution programme they put the phone down on me. Tight gits.
(richardm, Thu 4 Jun 2009, 17:12, Reply)