Rubbery to meet you
"Could I ask you for a favour?", asks the unassuming stranger to my good lady friend, whom we shall call R. The two of us are attending an alternative-lifestyle market in order to point and laugh at the double-ended rubber dongs, nipple clamps, and electric shock devices with attachments for various intimate regions.

I must at this point note that aforementioned R has seen, heard of, and in some cases even tried, pretty much every fetish going. She's rather proud that no matter what it is you're into, she's probably done something filthier.

"I don't know, what is it you need?" enquireth she, half expecting some unwanted advances on her person.

"Could you blow a balloon up, as much as you possibly can, while I watch and wank?"

R stares.

"And if you can make it burst, that'd be even better".

R blinks.

"erm..... er..... er.... excuse me... I...", she mutters and walks off, speechless, crashing into a rack of riding crops, scattering them across the floor.

Balloon guy, if you're out there, you are a legend.
( admiral crunch holds the newsreader's nose squarely, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 14:04, 1 reply)

Methinks perhaps
he misunderstands the concept of a blowjob and the purpose of condoms...
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 17:41, closed)