Holy dog poo
Last year, I went to visit my sister who lives in the middle of a small town in Devon. I took my dog with me who is normally very well house trained and can hold it in for hours.

Whilst we were in my sister's flat, Molly (the dog) started looking very restless and whimpering a bit so I thought that she must need a wee.

As my sister lives in a 1st floor flat, in the middle of the town, there was a distinct lack of grass around and Molly is very particular where she goes to the loo and will only ever do it on grass (don't ask me why).

Just over the road from my sister's flat is a church with a very grassy grave yard around it. I thought that God wouldn't mind her doing a cheeky wee on hallowed ground.

As soon as I got her on the path (leading up to the door of the church) Molly squatted and did the biggest, most smelly, evil and runny poo I have ever seen. It just kept on coming and coming and was almost bigger than her. I don't think that bones she had eaten the night before agreed with her.

Just at that very moment, the door of the church opened and a bride and groom exited followed by the the rest of their wedding party, heading straight for the huge steaming pile that Molly had just finished building.

She hadn't even finished properly but I knew that it was time to leave before I was smited or at least beaten up by the groom so I dragged her out of the gate, still in poo position and scuttled off down the road, feeling very guilty.

Now, I'm normally very diligent when it comes to picking up after her. However, this poo was so big and runny I would have stood no chance with my little poo bag. It would have required a shovel and dustbin bag at least.

So, if you had your wedding in a nice little church in Devon last year and it was ruined by some lout letting his dog do a massive, evil poo in front of you, sorry, I really didn't mean for that to happen.

Ticket, one way please.
(Tom Jones's Mojo Hasn't had any since, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:25, 4 replies)

which town?
that's an amusing story :-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:43, closed)

Tiverton
Not my favourite town in Devon, I have to say.
(Tom Jones's Mojo Hasn't had any since, Fri 12 Dec 2008, 14:46, closed)

I read this thinking that
your sister did a poo on a grave.
( Grokthought wouldn't pay that for Chinese 5-Spice, Sat 13 Dec 2008, 10:17, closed)

Dogs
have evil bums. There's nothing anyone can do about it.

Anyone who's ever had a dog will empathise with you...
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Sun 14 Dec 2008, 1:11, closed)