freddie kreuger
age 16, family holiday in florida. had images of myself returning to school all grown up for the sixth form with long, lean bronzed limbs. bearing in mind my flab is lucky to go from blue to white this was perhaps overambitious.

fell asleep on a cloudy beach covered in suncream for about an hour. woke up to find i was a bit pink. excellent, i thought, seeing the transformation into golden sex kitten begin.

five hours later i am in agony in bed. every single inch of me apart from my back is burnt to buggery. i was the colour of a freshly boiled lobster and even having a sheet over me hurt like hell. after about three days it all turned into gooey green blisters the size of fried eggs which would burst randomly and pour their sticky soggy evil smelling badness over everything.

after a week of lying in bed i decided my holiday was fucked enough and ventured out with my family. cue the biggest florida plantation house in the world. they had to get me a wheelchair. the americans were all staring in sympathy at the poor young girl struck down in her prime. until my brother ran me over all the cobbles at speed and i swore more like a sailor being tattooed. jesus that hurt. not to mention my green, cracked, freddie kreuger face and the wet patches of burst blisters. eventually the torture was over and i stood up and walked... their faces were a picture... had it been tennessee they might have thought it was a miracle!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 22 Apr 2005, 11:52, Reply)