On how I hate Opticians, and why Karma is crap...
It’s highly likely that, should reincarnation be a reality (and thus Karma also), I have been a very, very bad person/tree/ant in a previous life.

How does this manifest itself? Is my life horrible? Am I in my own personal hell? No. It’s quite a simple, insouciant attack on my everyday life in that every time I try to do something relatively simple, it turns out to be hugely difficult, and is often populated by a cast of completely incompetent characters.

For example:

I sometimes wear contact lenses. It’s a vanity thing: I’d always wanted to wear posh sunglasses, so the moment the sun comes out, in go the lenses and on go the Oakleys. And so it came to pass that I ran out of my prescription of daily throwaway lenses. I went to Specsavers (no, you should not go there), and had another lens test done, and paid them £60 for that and a new batch of lenses. This was 2 weeks ago.

Today, I realise that I have heard nothing about the lenses. So I call up Specsavers, who put me on hold for 20 minutes. I get bored of waiting, and walk down to the store. After queuing for half a millennia, I get to the counter, and say:

“Hi. I called earlier to find out if you had the contact lenses I ordered. I was then put on hold for 20 minutes, so I thought it would be quicker to walk here to find out if you have them.”

I was met with a blank stare. “Oh, right.” Said the person at the counter. “Can I akse when you ordered them?” (What the hell does 'akse' mean anyway? And what do people mean when they're being 'pacific'? it's ASK and SPECIFIC!)

And so I regaled the story again. I gave her my name, and she rifled through her drawers (careful now). At this point, she told me that I was not on their records.

“That’s funny,” I said “as here is my receipt that says I am.” They had managed to spell my name incorrectly – clearly, spelling your name phonetically when it is difficult to spell is a concept too abstract for some people to comprehend. Eventually, we found my file.

They only had the left lenses in.

“I can give you the left ones, if that helps?” she said.

“How is that helpful? Leaving me half-blind is helpful, is it? I’m trying desperately not to be angry, but so far I’ve paid you £60 for precisely nothing. I’d like to know what you’re going to do about it!”

The short answer is: nothing. I’m left waiting, with no way of finding out what is where and how long it’s going to be there for. Grrrrr.

OK, it’s not on topic, but then neither are the posts that go along the lines of “LOL someone pissed me off when I was a teenager so I hit them with a brick when I was older and harder LOL”; which hardly illustrates the delicate balance of Cosmic Harmony, does it? Besides, I don’t believe in Karma… After years of study and hard work, the best job I can get is as a recruitment consultant. I hate myself.

/End rant. Move along, nothing to see here...

EDIT: I hate my job. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. If anyone is a hiring manager and wants someone who is keen to learn, enthusiastic and dedicated, I'm there! Just don't make me do sales! :)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 25 Feb 2008, 15:20, 2 replies)

Oh wow!
Recruitment Consultant! Good Lord, you must have done something bloody awful in your previous life.

I work in IT for a pretty big staffing company, and I've got to say it's a challenge. To sum up recruitment 'consultants' think estate agents but without intelligence or charm.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 25 Feb 2008, 15:56, closed)

I'm also looking for work.
Having taken the easy option of deciding to resign from my job in January.

I've got a great idea for making some money.

Actually, no I haven't. If I did have, i'd be doing something about it, rather than sitting here waiting for the house to be reclaimed by the bank.

Divorce is just around the corner for this idiot!

Oh well.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 25 Feb 2008, 19:51, closed)