Lurid Work Stories"I know a railwayman of 40-odd years' service," says Juan Quar, "and he tells me a new gruesome yarn each time we meet. Last week's was of checking the time on the wristwatch of a severed arm he'd just collected after a track fatality."
Tell us the horrible stories you tease the new hires with, or that you've been told.
NB By definition, these are probably all made up. Roll with it
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chthonic, Thu 5 Sep 2013, 17:33)
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Possibly pearoast, corpse-related A FOAF* needed a job, so his mate who worked for a funeral director wangled a night shift for him to see if he'd like it. It involved collecting bodies, tidying up the premises and a lot of sitting around playing cards between calls.
The bloke who worked there said 'We can have a laugh on this job!' and took the FOAF round the corpses, lifting shrouds and showing him the women's breasts and the men's genitals and making lewd comments. Then he lifted up one of the smaller women and pretended to dance with her.
At that point, the FOAF was so horrified that he left right away and fled home. He couldn't sleep at night afterwards and had a breakdown, and last we heard (some years back) he was still on the sick and unable to work.
I drive past the same undertakers' most days and still have a shameful snigger to myself.
*that's my son's friend's dad's mate
(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 20:45, 4 replies)
Think I would have been OK up until the dancing.(
edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 21:31,
closed)
We all have our limits.(, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 22:45, closed)
Seems familiar...www.artistdirect.com/video/tom-petty-mary-jane-s-last-dance/31796
(, Sun 8 Sep 2013, 12:36, closed)
I just FB IM'd the lad who told us this storyand he confirmed it, and added the intriguing detail that the dentures of the deceased all end up submerged together in the mortuary fish tank.
Also, when a local 7-a-side footer team urgently needed transport,they were taken to the match in a hearse along with its current occupant.
(, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 0:04, closed)
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