The OnosecondWired magazine once defined the 'onosecond' as the time between hitting 'send' and realising that you really didn't mean to send that to your granny.
What inappropriate email/text/photo have you sent to wrong people? Are they speaking to you any more?
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chthonic, Thu 26 May 2005, 10:15)
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Fun with poetryI'm kind of stretching this to its natural limits, but here goes...
English class, year 11, posh grammar school. Very nice, butter-wouldn't-melt English teacher sets, for Valentine's Day, a poem on the theme of love and vegetables.
Cue my epic in the form of:
My love
I give you a cucumber
You'll need it
Because you're dumped
This being a heinous crime against nature, I was swiftly dragged up to the office of the Head of English, told that what I had written was offensive to all women and given a detention. Another guy also got a detention, for his poem which apparently contained the lines "Take a stick of celery/Rub it on my bum".
To be fair, what did my teacher expect, giving a subject like "Love and Vegetables" to a class of teenage boys? It's like giving matches, petrol and copies of the Daily Mail to left wing arsonists.
(, Fri 27 May 2005, 18:44, closed)
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