Psychotic, sadistic PE teacher
We had a PE / games teacher called Mr Pratt.

As an aside, if your name was Pratt would you one day think to yourself: "Teaching! Now there's a profession where my name won't be the subject of ridicule"?

I attended a grammar school between 1981 and 1986 and much of what I describe below would probably land a teacher in court nowadays. But this was then:

Mr Pratt was ex-army and to be honest, a good teacher. Even though his punishments were sadistic, they were certainly effective. Two examples:

If you misbehaved in the gym, you got the "wallbars treatment".

An example of misbehaviour in PE was to have not thrown an indoor cricket ball hard enough at one of your classmates in a game of "burn ball". The object of said game was to throw the indoor cricket ball (a heavy, dense rubber ball) at your classmates' guts or kidneys and render them incapacitated on the floor. But if you weren't playing "properly", you'd get the wallbars.

The "offender" would have to climb the wallbars which covered the walls of the gym: a height of about 15 feet. You would then have to face forwards, into the gym while six of your classmates formed a cradle with their interlocked arms. You then had to fall forward, keeping your body straight, into the arms of your classmates. You literally put your life in their hands. And if you dared to close your eyes on the way down, you'd have to go back up and do it again.

Another one was one which I was a victim of:

I was having a fight (proper fists and feet schoolboy tussle) with my best mate (teenage boys tend to have lovers' tiffs) in the top playground.

The top playground was overlooked by the staffroom, so fights were usually pretty short-lived, except when Mr Pratt was involved.

So there we were, going hammer and tongs at each other; ripped blazers and so on, when we became aware of the doughnut of boys shouting "fight, fight!" around us parting.

We stopped fighting and through the parting came Mr. Pratt.

"Carry on" he said.
"Sir?" we said.

The fight had sort of lost its appeal by now but he continued to insist that we continue for his entertainment.

"Don't let me stop you: carry on!"

And so he made us beat the living crap out of each other.

Cunt!

(Apologies for length, girth etc.)
( <>Dog www.stevelaker.blog, Sat 21 Nov 2009, 12:53, Reply)