Now Hold On..

Would it really have hurt you to nod and say "Thanks but no thanks" as you passed the chav by? Misguided she might have been but that's no excuse for fucking rudeness.

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Sun 4 Apr 2010, 15:10, 1 reply)

Sorry Legless...
my problem was that she'd demanded in loud and coarse tones that I get out of her way, and as soon as as realised I wasn't as fit as her, she started trying to do everything she could to make sure I got on the train. I was quite capable; even if her heart was in the right place, it's still quite unpleasant to have someone assume you're incapable when you're visibly doing quite well. It was the quick change that got me - around here, someone can call you 'love' and make it an insult, and then proceed to be cloyingly helpful once they realise how it is. I find it quite embarrassing. It's the same deal as people who ask "what have you done to yourself?", assuming I've sprained an ankle and will have an entertaining story. I find it quite personal, attention like that from total strangers, and it freaks me out a little - even the special attention, since I don't need it and I'm not used to it.

It's like people who are, for example, introduced to a black bloke and then start talking about how much they love The Supremes. This happens to a family friend, Kevin, quite regularly. It's an embarrassing effort to show how 'okay' you are with something, and it makes me cringe.

To be fair, I probably was rude, but I didn't trust myself to say anything. They changed my medication recently, and I've been this close [--------] to murder all week. She got the idea as it was.
(Trauma, Sun 4 Apr 2010, 16:38, closed)

it's hard
I've been on both sides of it. Was on and off crutches for years after a serious accident when I was 13 and in a wheelchair (albeit only for a couple of months

Yes, the stares (people really do stare at you in a wheelchair, you'd think they'd never seen one) and constant jokey comments are irritating, but people do quite reasonably assume that crutches are just a temporary thing - that you've had a recent accident and you need help - cos that's what they're mostly used for.

So yeah, I get it. It's grating. But people mostly are just trying to be nice and maybe you should give them a break. It could be a lot worse (like the boy at school who thought it would be funny to loosen the screws on my crutches during a lesson, so when I got up and tried to leave they collapsed under me and I went crashing to the floor, dislocating my knee. That was the one and only time I've ever cried just out of despair at the pointless mundane cruelty of people.)

Got a bit emo at the end but I hope you get my point.
(jennymnemonic, Sun 4 Apr 2010, 22:25, closed)