ShopliftingWhen I was young and impressionable and on holiday in France, I followed some friends into a sweet shop and we each stole something. I was so mortified by this, I returned them.
My lack of French hampered this somewhat - they had no idea why the small English boy wanted to add some chews to the open box, and saw it as an attempt by a nasty foreigner oik to contaminate their stock. Not my best day.
What have you lifted?
(
chthonic, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 11:13)
« Go Back
Grand larceny...well, almostTraffic island bollards (you know white and yellow, about 3 foot high, blue arrow to tell you which side to drive): fancied one to make into student style drinks cabinet and aware of road works nearby where said items had been spotted waiting to be installed some days earlier. Gather friends, discuss plan: essentially park mark I Ford Fiesta (getaway vehicle of choice for all top villains I believe) round corner and casually walk up grab item and bundle in boot. However, best laid plans and all, as we turn up discover that roadworks are now complete and bollards very much attached to traffic island..."Not to worry chaps, back in a mo'" mutters Rab C and totters off under the bright street lights gathering momentum like a wildebeest crossing the vast savannah until we bear witness to the sight of a fully grown man rugby tackling a traffic bollard removing it completely unscathed from its concrete bed before returning with it and depositing it in the boot of the car all in full sight of passing traffic. Stunned silence followed by uncontrollable laughter followed by nervous drive home followed by parental query as to why part of the tax payers local infrastructure is cluttering up the garage.
Youth is wasted on the young you know.
Edit: In my defence I didn't waste its procurement and using a some chipboard, a jigsaw and a piano hinge I did manage to manufacture a rather magnificent drinks cabinet.
(
number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Thu 10 Jan 2008, 20:32,
2 replies)
Nesbitt?(, Thu 10 Jan 2008, 21:48, closed)
We (students) had one of thoseI think we found it, dislodged from its mount and slightly dented by some sort of impact. Kicked out the dent, took it home. It was actually a bit of a pain in the arse -- quite big, and the top wasn't flat so you couldn't out anything on it, it'd just fall off. And you couldn't turn it upside-down and use it as a bin, either (which is what we'd intended to do) for the same reason.
So it was just this huge and rather ugly ornament in the corner of the room.
(
reallywittyname veraciously conspues lexiphanicism on, Fri 11 Jan 2008, 10:48,
closed)
« Go Back