I officially look like a tramp
My friend and I were in town the other day when pounced upon by ywo RSPCA vultures, trying to pick over the bones of our poor student bank accounts.

My friend quickly made his excuses, saying he donated online. I was not quick enough though,

I simply said "I can't afford it"

But they were ready for that "it's just two pounds a month" charity vulture 1 countered.

However trying to shake them off my friend said "he's homeless" apparently he meant to say poor but instead said homeless.

Now I was chuckling a bit now but before my friend could correct himself, the charity lady did something unexpected, she asked me if I wanted any food and offered me a peach. Now I was a quite amused by this and respectfully declined and made my exit.

I was slightly insulted by how easy she found it to believe I was homeless, but she did work for a charity, so was probably more inclined to be kind and after all who would lie about something like that.

Now I didn't think much of it, but my friend said she believed it because I looked like a tramp, so he decided to see if other people would believe it.

So we were in Mcdonald the other day and chatting to the girl at the till, we were joking around and he got his change was just 5p so he said just keep it, whereas I had about £3 worth of change so she joked "I suppose you want your change don't you?"

Now I suppose you can see where this is going can't you.

My friend said in the same jocular voice "He certainly does, he's homeless"

Now as we'd been joking so I expected her to take it as a joke, however instead she stopped laughing and started giving me advice on how to get a council house, I thanked her and quickly made my exit.

On an unrelated note I've started shaving and am getting a hair cut.

Length? Well it is awful cold on the street.
(Charlietron Still can't think of anything witty to put here, Fri 3 Jul 2009, 12:12, Reply)