The Award for sheer whencheryGoes to my 3rd year flatmates who were utterly loony- me an the roomie asked 2 nutters we’d lived near in halls 1st n 2nd year to take the empty room in a flat we’d be moving into (complete with twee leather sofas and glass top tables)for £370 a month.
The morning before our lease began, one moved her kit into “the big room” - claiming it for herself and her minger flatmate- then moved out half her wardrobe to her boyfriends place across town where she lived for the rest of the year!
The left-behind girl would lock herself in “the big room” for days with the TV on and the radio up, emerging only to make something burnt and foul on a baking pan that was crusty with the charred remains of chips, foetus or macaroni (we never found out), every night putting the pan in our useless dishwasher. Everything that passed through that thing for a year was covered in little bits of blackened debris.
She didn’t like pubs, “didn’t approve” of drinking (so we were pissed Thursday, Friday, Saturday), never cleaned the shared spaces (there was fur rugs of dust on half the house), squealed when she had sex, had loads of mates up without asking if we minded 4 twunts sleeping in the living room for 3 day stretches, played hideous Christian Rock, whined on the house phone to her boyfriend/mother/sister loudly in the next room that we hated her.
When we tried to tell her we’d found other people we wanted to live with she lost it- utterly bonkers. Started telling people that we were lesbians and Satanists that we were trying to throw her things out (leave dried flowers on a shelf in a dusty pile for 4 months I’m bloody throwing them out!).
She and the absentee knacker installed a new lock on their bedroom door and bolted for the last 3 months of the lease…which I unscrewed and replaced with the old knob.Inside we found she’d been hoarding cutlery, dishes, cleaning supplies and an insane amount of Charmin. Things of ours- old magazines, tea towels, a set of hairbrushes and the remote to my TV were in a box under her desk. The pair of them officially moved out 8 Aug, having nicked three of my dvd’s and left a manly load of crap in the toilet.
See 'Flatmate from Hell' post above for our relatiation(s). Heh.
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 20:23,
archived)
The morning before our lease began, one moved her kit into “the big room” - claiming it for herself and her minger flatmate- then moved out half her wardrobe to her boyfriends place across town where she lived for the rest of the year!
The left-behind girl would lock herself in “the big room” for days with the TV on and the radio up, emerging only to make something burnt and foul on a baking pan that was crusty with the charred remains of chips, foetus or macaroni (we never found out), every night putting the pan in our useless dishwasher. Everything that passed through that thing for a year was covered in little bits of blackened debris.
She didn’t like pubs, “didn’t approve” of drinking (so we were pissed Thursday, Friday, Saturday), never cleaned the shared spaces (there was fur rugs of dust on half the house), squealed when she had sex, had loads of mates up without asking if we minded 4 twunts sleeping in the living room for 3 day stretches, played hideous Christian Rock, whined on the house phone to her boyfriend/mother/sister loudly in the next room that we hated her.
When we tried to tell her we’d found other people we wanted to live with she lost it- utterly bonkers. Started telling people that we were lesbians and Satanists that we were trying to throw her things out (leave dried flowers on a shelf in a dusty pile for 4 months I’m bloody throwing them out!).
She and the absentee knacker installed a new lock on their bedroom door and bolted for the last 3 months of the lease…which I unscrewed and replaced with the old knob.Inside we found she’d been hoarding cutlery, dishes, cleaning supplies and an insane amount of Charmin. Things of ours- old magazines, tea towels, a set of hairbrushes and the remote to my TV were in a box under her desk. The pair of them officially moved out 8 Aug, having nicked three of my dvd’s and left a manly load of crap in the toilet.
See 'Flatmate from Hell' post above for our relatiation(s). Heh.