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This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN

* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 54, 53, 52, 51, 50, ... 1

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What is the correct term for someone who can wank with both hands?
Ambidickstrous.
(, Sat 17 May 2025, 3:36, Reply)
What did Carly Simon sing to the block of Blue Stilton?
You're so VEINY
(, Fri 16 May 2025, 22:24, Reply)
I fucking hate that cosmic entity who consumes planets to sustain his life force.
I think I might be Galactus-intolerant.
(, Fri 16 May 2025, 9:45, Reply)
Phil Collins really enjoyed his Sunday lunch
It was a gravy kind of love.
(, Thu 15 May 2025, 21:52, 1 reply, 2 days ago)
I was told boxing might affect my driving but I was never that long in the ring
as I couldn't get past a round a bout
(, Thu 15 May 2025, 20:21, Reply)
I Can't Get Enough of These
by Arthur Anymore
(, Thu 15 May 2025, 9:38, 2 replies, latest was 3 days ago)
Painful Joints
By Arthur Itis.
(, Wed 14 May 2025, 9:23, Reply)
The Best Thing for the Pregnant
by Anna Bortion
(, Wed 14 May 2025, 8:30, Reply)
Why did the Los Angeles cop stomp on a bottle of nasal spray?
Because it was Afrin-American
(, Sun 11 May 2025, 17:13, Reply)
Those stupid polo shirts with the stupid crocodile logo really piss me off. I hate them.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant
(, Fri 9 May 2025, 16:33, 1 reply, 6 days ago)
What was André 3000's dad called?
André 2999
(, Wed 7 May 2025, 13:48, Reply)
Which magician’s assistant lubricates her anus with a type of clarified butter, originating from the Indian subcontinent, prior to being penetrated by an alsatian?
Dab o' m'ghee
(, Wed 7 May 2025, 13:34, Reply)
What's the opposite of a Conclave?
A Convlex.
(, Wed 7 May 2025, 11:45, 3 replies, latest was 2 weeks ago)
What do you call a batch of purple flower-flavoured sweets that was rejected for not meeting the required quality standards?
Subparma violets
(, Wed 7 May 2025, 9:19, Reply)
I'd forgotten everything I knew about fizzy sweets
But lucky I went on a Refresher course.
(, Tue 6 May 2025, 20:40, Reply)
What did Agnetha Fältskog say when a cow vomited on her?
Thank you for the moo sick
(, Mon 5 May 2025, 9:37, Reply)
"The Stripping Cowboy"
By Tex McClothesoff
(, Sun 4 May 2025, 18:39, 3 replies, latest was 1 week ago)
Which magician’s assistant is type of clarified butter, originating from the Indian subcontinent?
Debbie McGhee
(, Sat 3 May 2025, 17:51, Reply)
Dog Poisons
by Theo Bromine
(, Sat 3 May 2025, 12:43, Reply)
what do you all a cod that collects cars and is driving a car
a fishy in auto
(, Fri 2 May 2025, 22:53, 2 replies, latest was 2 weeks ago)
Repetition

(, Thu 1 May 2025, 23:21, Reply)
Who is the cheapest actor in the Star Wars franchise?
Temu Temuera Morrison
(, Thu 1 May 2025, 9:38, 7 replies, latest was 2 weeks ago)
What does a vampire take on their summer holiday?
Sunscream
(, Tue 29 Apr 2025, 8:24, 1 reply, 2 weeks ago)
What do you call someone who likes the finer things in life, but in a concise and well-organised manner?
An efficienado
(, Mon 28 Apr 2025, 6:36, Reply)
someone boobytrapped my traditional morroccan clay cooking dish
it was sabotagine!
(, Fri 25 Apr 2025, 16:37, Reply)
Someone booby-trapped my wooden-soled shoe.
It was sabotage.
(, Thu 24 Apr 2025, 12:17, Reply)
What do you call a large grey land mammal that trunkfucks it's own kids
A sickophant
(, Tue 22 Apr 2025, 20:18, 1 reply, 4 weeks ago)
"How To Become A Blacksmith"
By Anne Ville
(, Tue 22 Apr 2025, 13:11, Reply)
I went to France as I was obsessed with buying new pans for my kitchen but whenever I asked for the shop they sent me to a church
They just couldn't understand my Le Creuset fix
(, Sun 20 Apr 2025, 9:23, 1 reply, 4 weeks ago)
Where do Italians obtain Camel's milk?
Da Roma dairy
(, Sun 20 Apr 2025, 8:57, Reply)

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