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This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN

* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17, ... 1

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Which popular reggae singer is traditionally made with liver, and mixed with wine and spices until it's cooked down into a spreadable texture?
Pâté Banton!
(, Wed 1 Dec 2021, 19:07, Reply)
Which popular reggae singer weighs between 115 pounds (52.2 kg) and 118 pounds (53.5 kg)?
Pato Bantam!
(, Wed 1 Dec 2021, 19:00, Reply)
Who is the popular reggae singer that Gotham deserves?

Pato Batman!
(, Wed 1 Dec 2021, 18:43, Reply)
Which popular reggae singer is considered to be the founder of Western political philosophy?

Plato Banton!
(, Wed 1 Dec 2021, 8:07, 3 replies, latest was 1 day ago)

Two chimps in the bath. One says OO OO AH! aH! OO OO ! AH AH! so his mate says to him "Colin, if the water's that hot, just put some cold in."
(, Mon 29 Nov 2021, 19:13, 2 replies, latest was 1 day ago)

What do call a place where everyone dances in a pool of gravy?
A Bistotec.
(, Mon 29 Nov 2021, 1:31, Reply)
Something's been bugging me all day.


This concealed recording device I just found hidden under my desk.
(, Sun 28 Nov 2021, 19:41, Reply)

A man walks into a pub, and takes from his pocket a 12" high man who plays a tiny piano. Barman asks "Where'd you get him, then". Man replies "It's a mate of mine - he's got primordial dwarfism"
(, Sun 28 Nov 2021, 19:41, Reply)
Which popular reggae singer performs dressed as Widow Twankey?

Panto Banton!
(, Sun 28 Nov 2021, 16:54, 1 reply, 4 days ago)
What's the opposite of distilled water?

Diagitated water.
(, Thu 25 Nov 2021, 13:23, Reply)
What did Dennis the Menace call his chocolate-coloured dog?

Ganacher!!!
(, Tue 23 Nov 2021, 12:31, Reply)
Fallon Sherrock.
Nice to finally see a darts player with small tits.
(, Fri 19 Nov 2021, 13:27, 3 replies, latest was 1 week ago)
What song did ABBA write about getting trapped in a barn in Malmö and only surviving by eating cow vomit?
Thank you for the moo-sick
(, Wed 17 Nov 2021, 20:58, Reply)
Did you know that Thunberg lass was only in Glasgow talking up climate change so she could win local municipal winter services contracts more cheaply?
she's just launched Greta Gritters Greater Gretna
(, Wed 17 Nov 2021, 1:46, 3 replies, latest was 2 weeks ago)
Schrödingers pants:
hoping that it was just a wet fart
(, Tue 16 Nov 2021, 21:37, Reply)
What's Marty McFly's favourite racecourse?
Haydock (Hey, Doc)
(, Fri 12 Nov 2021, 20:07, 4 replies, latest was 1 week ago)
I've got a cold. Just an old-fashioned cold
It's a retrovirus.
(, Thu 11 Nov 2021, 9:21, Reply)
A Crap Joke
Please DO NOT try to commit suicide by overdosing on laxatives.

It's a shitty way to die.
(, Tue 9 Nov 2021, 22:57, Reply)
what low value metal objects are the greatest threat to the future of the human race?
Climate change.
(, Tue 9 Nov 2021, 18:18, Reply)
Which freshly-deceased popular reggae singer asked for artificial grass to be placed on his grave?

AstroTurf!!!
(, Sun 7 Nov 2021, 17:25, Reply)
Why does Arnold Rimmer have his kitchen fitted out with Italian designer appliances?
Because he's a Smeg head!
(, Sun 7 Nov 2021, 16:04, Reply)
What's Stevie Nicks' favourite conspiracy theory?
Qaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanon
(, Fri 5 Nov 2021, 11:13, 1 reply, 2 weeks ago)
What do you call a cow that you think you have seen before but you haven't
Deja Moo
(, Fri 5 Nov 2021, 10:43, 2 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
What did Stevie Nicks say when she was asked
how many large South American flightless birds she kept at home?

"Rhea? None!"
(, Fri 5 Nov 2021, 7:49, 2 replies, latest was 4 weeks ago)
What's the difference between Bono and anal sex in a public convenience?
One's noisy, and a painful arsehole. The other is anal sex in a public convenience.
(, Wed 3 Nov 2021, 12:59, 4 replies, latest was 4 weeks ago)
If cattle egrets are birds that often spend time close to livestock,
what do you call them when they leave the livestock?

Cattle egress!
(, Tue 2 Nov 2021, 15:42, 1 reply, 4 weeks ago)
What's the difference between a Bonio and anal sex in a public convenience?
One's a dog biccy. The other is a bog dickie.
(, Mon 1 Nov 2021, 0:12, Reply)
Why are a wolf's eyes made of eggs, milk and flour?
"All the batter to see you with, my dear!"

Sorry that I don't feel bad about this.
(, Sun 31 Oct 2021, 18:18, Reply)
Bought an album recently. All songs about bedspreads and pillowcases
They were all covers.

Also got an album themed around police officers pretending to be regular members of the public.

They were all undercovers.

Went to a nightclub recently, they gave me a bedspread on paying for admission.

There was a cover charge.
(, Sat 30 Oct 2021, 18:34, 2 replies, latest was 3 weeks ago)
How many b3tans does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to fill the socket, and the other to screw his balls in place.
(, Sat 30 Oct 2021, 6:48, Reply)

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