NEWSLETTER: "VISUALISE OPENING THIS NEWSLETTER AND ENJOYING IT"
"VISUALISE OPENING THIS NEWSLETTER AND ENJOYING IT"
This Week:
* GAME - Yes YOU can be a Freemason
* ACTORS - Spinning round (not like meatspin)
* CHALLENGE - Super Mario vs. Corel Draw
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________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're backing up the web
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | to 5 trillion floppy
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| disks... together"
B3ta electric email 773 - 08 Jun 2021
Read this issue to Alexa to show her a good time:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue773
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: HEBTRO SPONSORSHIP
Buy some lovely jeans
Thanks to Hebtro for sponsoring b3ta, helping
us to be able to put the time into researching
this newsletter every week. They make powerful
jeans that aren't cheap but will last a long
time and every pair bought helps support
stupid internet nonsense so dig deep you
twats.
https://hebtro.co/
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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE MADE THIS WEEK
Other thank storing pee in empty Strongbow cans
* SPINNING ACTORS - Dunk3d has been finding
photos of actors in different head rotations,
and then carefully lining them up so they,
well, rotate. He's done 26 of them now, the
crazy fool.
https://twitter.com/starturnz
* FREEMASON GAME - Jason Nelson writes,
"Adoring the wonders you spin out from B3TA
into the world, I’m hoping you’ll find my most
recent artgame curious enough to share. 'The
Bafflement Fires' is part artwork, part
digital recreation of a Freemason board game
from the 1950s. Based on found documents, the
game, built by a psychologist and Mason, was
an attempt to alter player’s perception
through quiz and play. While it appears some
of the game was lost/destroyed, enough was
there for me to create a largely accurate
videogame version." CONFESSION: This was
actually sent to us in 2015 and we're working
through an old backlog of email. But even 6
years late it's well worth a look:
http://www.dpoetry.com/fires
* WILLIAM BLAKE = PRINCE - A little wave to
"friend of the newsletter" John Higgs who's
got a new book out on William Blake - and in
this article he makes a compelling case for
his parallels with the much missed pop genius
Prince.
https://thequietus.com/articles/30026-william-blak...
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: HELP MATT ROUND FIND A SANDWICH SHOP
For one of his online stunt thingies
Matt writes, "Does anyone know someone with a
cafe/sandwich shop/restaurant who might want
to do a slightly daft PR stunt that'd probably
get some press attention? I have a simple idea
that'd loosely tie in with one of my
projects." You got that right? If you make
sarnies for a living please talk to Matt so
that he can scratch whatever the hell this
itch is.
https://twitter.com/mattround/status/1400746024893...
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: FESSHOLE
Your real life confessions shared for cheap lols
* EMBARRASSMENT #1 - "One of my neighbours
pops round every 3 months or so to tell me
he's going on holiday and to give me a key in
case of emergency. He collects it 2 weeks
later and gives me a bottle of wine. I have no
idea who he is or where he lives."
* EMBARRASSMENT #2 - "I met my partner when we
were both blind drunk and saved her name as a
string of ???? Managed to bluff through three
dates without knowing. On the fourth I had to
rummage in her handbag when she went to the
toilet to check her driving licence. Been
together 14 years now."
* AND SLEEP - "I'm a night owl. Husband is an
early riser. Sometimes I pretend to be asleep
in the morning so I can listen to him sing
songs about our cat while he showers. He only
does it when he thinks I'm asleep. It's
adorable."
Follow the 142,000 people whose harddrives
should be thrown into the sun.
https://twitter.com/fesshole/
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: SITES IN BRIEF
Content from the other people in CB radio land
* POLICE RETURN WALLET AFTER 20 YEARS - this
accidental time capsule made us nostalgic for
when we had stuff and went out.
https://twitter.com/ryanseymour1983/status/1398692...
* BUY NATO COMMUNICATIONS FACILITY 'GOLF BALL'
- Can someone email Aphex Twin and tell him
we've found his perfect new recording studio?
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/commercial-property-fo...
* BLADE RUNNER vs MR BLOBBY - brilliantly
combined, it could be longer but doesn't
outstay any welcome, much like our penis.
https://b3ta.com/links/Improving_a_classic
* NEAT OPTICAL ILLUSION - fools your stupid
monkey brain into colorising a black and white
image. If you need reminding that you can't
trust your eyes because they fucking lie then
here it us. Gouge them out. It's the only way.
https://b3ta.com/links/Seeing_colour_courtesy_of_a...
* CLIMATE CHANGE BOT - This bot farm is
clicking adverts on any story about climate
change, with the intention of boosting the
visibility of those stories in the algorithms.
We suspect it highlights the failure of
everything being driven by fakeable data more
than it highlights climate issues, but
interesting to see such behaviour done so
openly.
https://syntheticmessenger.labr.io
* CAPTION AI - The Pudding are trying to win
the The New Yorkers' caption competition using
AI, asking users to vote on the funniest
generated caption in order to feed the
algorithm. They are at the "kind-of works"
stage, and only week 2.
https://pudding.cool/projects/caption-contest/
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If you're the smartest person in any room - then
you are excellent and have won the smartest
person in the room challenge.
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: "FRIDAY" GAME
Where's Wally, But With Emojis
Ramping up the difficulty by adding new emojis
each level works really well. They should have
ended on an impossible ASCII emoticon version,
though.
https://gamesforcrows.itch.io/feels
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: IMAGE CHALLENGE
This week: Super Mario
Switch on your Nintendos and put on your
overalls we're having a week of Super Mario
related photoshops and gifs.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/supermario
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Get your gay porn star by thinking of an
electronic music artist and adding the letter K.
E.g. Aphex Twink (OK, that's the only one,
sorry)
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: FOLLOW UPS
What happened next on previous stories (sort of_)
* WAKE UP ED! Old b3tonian Ed Morris is in the
news through finding his dead mum's voice on
an old alarm clock and then going viral.
Blimey.
https://twitter.com/BBCBreakfast/status/1399641748...
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: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE
Free ideas for you old dears
* A BOT THAT EMAILS RADIO DJS - with requests
for shout outs for their sick pets "Oh please,
Craig Charles, play some ABBA for my sick
doggy Petra. She perks right up with some
ABBA" And then keep a tally of what gets read
out.
* A VIRUS THAT EATS CONTENT - we all know
there's too much content, can our friends in
bootsector payload industry do something about
it?
* ALT PUBS - Whilst we're still grappling with
coming out of lockdown, pubs should be run
like a Yo Sushi: pints, shots, glasses of wine
trundle past your table on a conveyor belt and
you take what you want and settle the bill at
the end.
Bung your slops into the form:
https://b3ta.com/mailus/
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: PATREON THANKS
We love all these people. Almost sexually.
*HEBTROCO* *JAMES O'BRIEN* *KATE* *MARK
MCCREADIE* *MR PHIL DONNELLY* *SHOWRAT* *SIMON
JAMES* *STOOBERT*
24-7 DEATH, ALAN CHARLTON, ALISTAIR, BRIAN
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SPAZZCAPTAIN, WENDY GOODE, NAT KING COLESLAW,
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lee burnett, Richard Matthias, @mattdawhit,
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Evans, Jm McNven, Kate Devlin, Kev Adams,
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Wilkes, midnightrambler, mil jamieson, Neil de
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bewes, Paul Cherry, Paul Smith, Paul
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wouda, Philip Kinchington, pookong, Rich Pope,
Richard Beckett, Rob Mahon, Rob Vincent,
Robbie Lesiuk, Ross Carter, RossOverThere,
Saleem Ahmad, Scott S. Kramer, sean casely,
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Simon waterfall, Stephen Waller, Steve
Anglesey, Steven Smith, Stuart Ashen, Tim
Jokl, Tim Mouncer, Tim Weaver, Tom Crick, Tom
Rees-Williams, Tom Ryan, TownsendsPublisher,
Wil Hadden, Will Goulden, AuntieSash
Hazlewood, Byron Geoffrey Farrow, Chef Twat,
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Daniel Chote, Fergus McKay, fourstar, Geoff
Tidey, Geoffrey Balme, Graham Licence, James
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Carl Mesner Lyons, Chris Johnson, Emma Sykes,
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Tom Freke, Sam Anderson, Jess Baker, Adam
Beardwood, David Stark, Julie Brumlik,
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Robinson, Andy Candler, Connor Parslow, Craig
Naples, Daniel Moeller, Duncan STrickland,
Harry, Irene Semanchuk, Joseph Mulvaney,
Michael Kitt, Nicky Hewgill, Paul Topping,
peter royal, Richard Speed, Sentient Meatbag,
Tim Beachy, Dominic Le Garsmeur, Mark Benson,
Danny Kodicek, Deny Coughlan, Nick Kent, Russ
Anderson, Adam Kaczmarek, Andrea Vail, Andy
Shirling, Ben Chapman, ben cowell-thomas, Ben
Groom, Ben Sugden, Cat Conner, Centuries of
Sound, Claire Allen, Claire Zolkwer, Darren
John Harris, Dave The Hammer Parry, David
Bond, David Ellinor, Daz Wright, Emily Payne,
Emma Nicol, FuzzyFreaks, Gary Sharp, Gwyn
Fisher, Hugh Noble, Iain M Barker, Ilya
olak-Anti, Jennifer Moquin, Jim Lucking, John
M, Jon Bounds, Lee Ball, Louis E, Lyra Jay,
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Tom Clark, Tony East, wigglywigglyworm, Adam
Tickner, Al Napp, Andrew Harris, Bobod, Chris
Ward, Jace Otting, James Meers, John
Griffiths, Paul Mancini, Rob Potter, Tanya
Kant, Victoria Wood, Graham Freeman, Caroline
Kahn, Matt.
EDITORIAL THANKS: Monkeon & Matt Round
additional links; HappyToast for image
challenge help; and Dr Dunno for something or
other. Proofing by Kat E.
And thank you to newish Patreons Ben Rout, Tim
Clarke, Simon Balch, Clemence Saussez, Derek
Colley. Martin Pritchard, Stephanie Wissinger,
Dion Ashton and Paul Blanchard. Thanks to EVEN
NEWER ONES: Fadgebadger, Mark (Mavis), Joshua
Rackstraw, Mike Stringer, Eliot Beer, Harri
Bionic, Chris Lindley, Stuart B, Jon Morris
Smith, Daniel Malbon, James Heaver and Phil
Lovell. And further thanks to newer ones: Ben
Oliver, James Wise, Claire Turner, Omnipiss,
Lindsay Mclaughlin, Mellyfish, Simon Edwards,
Dave Wong & Stafford Lawrence. NEWEST -
special love to NEW PATREON Phillip Spowart.
We love you and do please donate as you get
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