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hi guy's
How r u 2day lol

My boss is in the Caribbean, which I pronouce 'CaRIBbean' because I am a fucking nobber.

I've had four deliveries of stuff today, I'm well pleased I came to work. Got any shipments due?
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 11:59, archived)
A record, a t shirt, a pair of Pumas for my wife and a Motorhead pint glass courtesy of banned poster Dozer 4eva in r sharts

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:00, archived)

Mötörhëäd, more like
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:12, archived)
Bloater fed, more like

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:14, archived)
Snails are rubbish at hide and seek

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:28, archived)
99994 ..... 99995 .... 99996 .... 99997 .... 99998 ... 99999 ....
10000 HERE I COME READY OR NOT!
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:13, archived)
That's bad counting.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 23:47, archived)
I'm just about to drop a shipment as it goes
just had an order from someone called Quim, I had no idea Quim was a first name
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:02, archived)
Yeah u do, it's ur first name lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:03, archived)
lol ur right lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:04, archived)
I no lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:04, archived)
lol wot u like lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:08, archived)
Is he a eskimo lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:04, archived)
lol dunno lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:08, archived)
lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:11, archived)
Ian.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:03, archived)
Ben.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:08, archived)
a nice man might bring me some marijuana
which i pronounce 'mariHWAna' because i am a fucking nobber
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:09, archived)
In my head, I pronounce fishes as faeces because i am a fucking nobber

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:10, archived)
Marry jew anna

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:10, archived)
<s> Give me hope

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:17, archived)
Cuba I calls Coo-bah
just like the locals
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:11, archived)
I pronounce it 'moribund FLEBsite'

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:13, archived)
yeah right

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:16, archived)
Tesco bloke should be here any minute
I pronounce it Tescos even though there's no s at the end.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:18, archived)
to rhyme with lesbos?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:20, archived)
that's the standard polish pronunciation

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:27, archived)
wait, grrry's gonna feature on the new queen latifah album?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:02, archived)
A thick cunt I used to work with called it Tescoses

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:21, archived)
I shop at ASDAs now

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:22, archived)
Aagh

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:25, archived)
My inlaws mispronounce everything
Wetherspoons is Wutherspoons, Poppadoms are Pompadoms. They mispronounce the names of people we know. It's extraordinary.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:39, archived)
One of my mother's friends repeatedly referenced the works of popular author 'Roland Dahl'

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:49, archived)
Ate a lot of raw fish, I bet.

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:00, archived)
the plural is actually Tesci

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:32, archived)
Tescodes

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:33, archived)
and if a woman shops there, you have to call it Tesca

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:36, archived)
and if she buys their own brand IUD it's called a Tesca Coil

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:39, archived)
here's one for you
🎵Let's all go to Tescos, where Grrry gets his best clothes 🎵 Na na na na (hey!) 🎵 Na na na na (hey!) 🎵
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:35, archived)
starting to regret signing up for my account tbh

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:01, archived)
starting?!

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:04, archived)
First grindr hookup of the week?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:39, archived)
stupid delivery prick is late now

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:11, archived)
half an hour late to a two-hour time slot
useless bastards
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:39, archived)
sounds about right

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:48, archived)
yeah I'm waiting for delivery of a load of cash from my building society
and a dvd
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:20, archived)
Yes hello, I'd like to convert my maturing 25k ISA to 1p coins please, and can you courier it all across to my office, kthx

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:24, archived)

maturing 25k ISA to 1p coins please, and can you courier it all across to my office, kthx old casio calculator into a remote heating control system for my house, because I am Grrrmachine and I am a fucken willy lol
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:31, archived)
It's good to have a hobby

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:33, archived)

h j

lol
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:38, archived)
2 Can m8
I don't even own a house
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:38, archived)
You're the board's own MacGuyver m8

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:39, archived)
as long as it makes my mullet socially acceptable, I'm ok with that

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:40, archived)
Wow a dvd
Well retro
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:20, archived)
I ordered a record.
I also ordered a new aux cable thing for the car becuase the stupid unit needs a stupid cable that only the stupid company that makes the unit stupid make.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:23, archived)
I missed out on a free ticket to see the long-sold-out Oh Sees gig not 5mins walk from my gaff on Friday night
Apparently it was brilliant, which is helpful to know, eh :(
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:28, archived)
ma8, we were all waiting for you by the bar
it was well peng, we got to meet oh AND one of the sees!
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:00, archived)
:((((((((((

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 16:54, archived)
sounds pretty stupid

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:28, archived)
here's a shipment for you
*guffs*
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 12:59, archived)

uffs ives you a lovingly wrapped present with a thoughtfully hand written card
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:18, archived)
Waiting on a shirt to be delivered
And a couple of new vape juices
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:02, archived)

r

lol
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:13, archived)
Lol af

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:14, archived)
lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:03, archived)
I found an old DAT of my college work
I sent it off to some AV company who are transferring the tracks onto CD - I'm really looking forward to hearing some of the stuff we did. There were a couple of quite nice arrangements with some pretty good musicians. It was also back before I lost the few skills I had as a bass player so it may be bittersweet.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:39, archived)

b
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 13:41, archived)

pl g
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:04, archived)
lol

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:06, archived)
this is why we can't have nice things

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:31, archived)
well really now

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:32, archived)

well i'm
now gay

lol
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:53, archived)
are you proud of yourself?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:07, archived)
a bit, yeah

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:18, archived)
I'm in you disappointed too

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:19, archived)

ell rea i
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:57, archived)
is this how you really want to start the week? Is it?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:09, archived)
y

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:13, archived)
I'm very disappointed in you

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:18, archived)
great
real mature guys
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:03, archived)
CaRIBean queen
now we're shaRING the same dream,
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:48, archived)
I always thought he said caribou Queen
until I was 43 1/2 years old
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 14:58, archived)
No more love on the rut?

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:06, archived)
I thought he said "'ello dere mon"

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:12, archived)
urgh...

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:18, archived)
Nah, I have to pick stuff up.
Bottle of jack Daniels for a present and some crickets for the spider
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:22, archived)
My interviewers are late.
How rude.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:24, archived)
Very unprofessional

(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:27, archived)
various adaptor cables and sockets and things. getting a bit annoyed waiting for them tbpfh.
oh and i need to send a parcel to france but laziness forbids it.
(, Mon 5 Mar 2018, 15:44, archived)