b3ta.com user alexnessie
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Hey. I'm Alex.


**I managed to get user id 20000...so ha**



What Is Your Battle Cry?

Lo! Who is that, striding through the tundra! It is Alexnessie, hands clutching buzzsaw hand extensions! And with a bloodthirsty howl, his voice cometh:

"I'm going to f**k you with such zeal, you'll age fifty years!!"

Find out!
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Best answers to questions:

» Shit Stories

Well this QotW is going to be shit
BADUM TISH!


/badjoke
(Wed 5th May 2004, 22:31, More)

» Have you ever started a fire?

Yep. Amateur stylee
me and a mate (let's call him kimball 'cause thats his name) took firelighters, balloons and butane out one night.

A 2 minute walk away from the local 5-0 HQ kimball filled two extra large balloons with butane while i made a makeshift flare with balloon, plastic tube, ground magnesium, and crushed firelighters...we then placed the flare in the ground, while i got kimball to kick the butballoons at the flare, dumb idea? Yep!

Both balloons hit the flare and in a second or less, kimball was surrounded in a 40 foot fireball.

He came running out for something to put the remaining stuff out...so i hid the expensive stuff (red cola...did you know you can't buy alcohol at 9am at night smelling of firelighters?) and gave him the cheap (free) water to put it out.

MORAL OF THE STORY : do not set off 40 foot fireballs near the local 5-0.
(Tue 2nd Mar 2004, 18:02, More)

» When were you last really scared?

Christ, twice on Saturday (yes, last saturday, the 24th)
Was sitting round a mates house, playing Guitar Hero and getting a few drinks in, and my phone goes off, the ex had texted me whining about something, so I sent her back the old "Go away, I hate you, blah blah blah" and got back "I might be pregnant, If I am it's yours."

Fuck.

Later on, same night, well, Sunday morning about 5am, but still.
A mate who'd been there earlier comes back with one of his friends, who seems a bit sketchy as soon as he walks through the door. Fair enough, we think, these guys haven't got anywhere to stay at 5am, they can chill here till the afternoon. But this guy sits down beside the owner of the house, and starts getting a bit loud and honestly, a bit of a cunt. So he starts accusing the house owner of "hitting Jade" (none of us KNOW anyone called Jade) and we're all trying to calm him down. House owner takes the dog for a walk to calm himself down, comes back in, and this guy pulls a fucking combat knife on him IN HIS OWN HALLWAY. We manage to get the knife off him, and get him the fuck out of there.
(Mon 26th Feb 2007, 4:06, More)

» The worst sex I ever had

Christ.
Not sex, but beforehand, me and the missus at the time were lying on the couch, stoned off of our tits, and she goes down on me, couple minutes later I felt metal digging into my knob, and blood...quite a fair bit of blood.

She had braces, proper train-track style ones.

I'll let you work out what happened.

You shouldn't fucking bleed from there.
(Mon 18th Jun 2007, 6:16, More)

» Pet Names

my dog is called snowy.
we lost him in foot deep snow when we got him, thats the reason for the name.
(Wed 25th Feb 2004, 13:37, More)
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