» Helicopter Parents

My mother the control freak
My mother tries to manage everybody's life that she comes into contact with. My fathers, my sister's, mine, her friends', my friends', the window cleaner, the shop assistant in Sainsburys.... you get the idea.

When I was 17 I had no idea what I wanted to study at university. Truth be told, I just wanted to put off getting a job for 3 years. I was thinking of Geography, because I found it easy, and it was the least boring of the things I did at school. I decided straight away that Oxford/Cambridge weren't for me. I still went to the open days to satisfy my mother and my school, but snuck off and went shopping instead. Apparently, Geography is a worthless subject, Geography graduates never get jobs and I'd end up penniless living in a gutter (in the words of my mother).

In the end all my teachers were on my side but my mother insisted on talking to all of them and trying to get them to persuade me not to do Geography and to do something prestigious like Economics or Classics (I studied both for A level but struggled with them and knew I'd never be able to do them at degree level). My teachers just accepted that my mother was a bit unhinged, I think they were used to parents like that - I went to private school. We never really settled the disagreement but ultimately, I filled in the form for myself, went to the open days myself, and studied for the exams myself. I got 3 As and went to the (more modern but still good) university I wanted and studied Geography. I graduated a couple of months ago and currently have a job in an area that I am interested in, that I got for myself despite my mother not thinking it is worthwhile (doesn't pay enough). I'm unfortunately still living with my parents, but am hoping to move out soon, not to live in the gutter.

My mother's helicopter parenting has been something I have rebelled against for many years, with the result that it has made me much more independent and determined to succeed once I've fought to be able to do the things I want. When her nagging and criticising of my life gets too much, I politely remind her that I could be shooting up heroin in a squat somewhere and robbing old ladies to pay for my next fix.

I found out last year that sixth formers can now tick a box on the UCAS form which allows their parents to handle the entire application process for them. Unbelievable... what next? Parents going to lectures for their children and sitting the exams? A degree is something you have to be very committed to and I don't believe that anybody should be forced into studying something they're not happy with.
(Sun 13th Sep 2009, 18:45, More)

» Cringe!

The veggie stand
This was totally out of character for me, I am usually more politically correct than this!

Summer of 2007, I went to Leeds festival with a few friends. Myself and 2 friends were watching bands in the NME/Radio 1 tent while another friend was watching a different band elsewhere. He wanted to meet up with the rest of us so my friend was trying to explain to him in a text exactly where to find us, as it's difficult in the dense crowds.

He said "I've told him we're just in front of the veggie stand"

I turned around and saw, behind us, the raised platform where disabled people can get a better view of the bands playing, at the back of the tent. Without really thinking about it,

"That's not a very nice thing to say about the disabled" I responded.

"I meant the vegetarian food stall outside the tent!" my friend clarified.

I have never had such a non-PC thought in my life. I genuinely thought he was referring the disabled platform as the 'veggie stand'. My friends haven't let me forget it.
(Mon 1st Dec 2008, 23:58, More)

» Tightwads

Student housemates
I'm a student and I lived with some proper cheapskates last year, they'd do anything they could to avoid buying more bread or toilet paper. One of them went to extreme lengths in his cheapskateness.

One morning I was in the kitchen fixing myself some cereal for breakfast when Cheapskate Boy was about to go to a lecture. He decided he wanted to take some water with him to drink during the day but was unable to find a water bottle lying around. Rather than just paying 40p to buy a bottle of water from the Student Union shop to re-use, he decided to use an empty Sainsburys vegetable oil bottle that was sitting waiting to be rinsed and recycled.

As you'll probably know, oil doesn't easily come out of the bottle, and oil bottles don't exactly seal well. He rinsed the bottle, filled it with water, and took it to campus. He then claimed that it hadn't tasted too bad although he did admit it had opened in his bag and spilled a watery oily mess.

I encountered another housemate attempting to make a sandwich one morning from 2 very green crumpets because he was too much of a cheapskate/selfish git to go across the road and buy some bread.

Luckily for my sanity, I no longer live with these weirdos.
(Fri 24th Oct 2008, 14:21, More)

» The Meaning Of Giff

Horsham
Cheap meat of mysterious provenance sold in lower end supermarkets.
(Tue 1st May 2018, 17:20, More)

» Amazing displays of ignorance

Jade Goody
A good friend of mine, currently a Masters student, very intelligent but occasionally lacking in common sense. Shortly before the well publicised demise of the above named reality TV star, we were discussing the fact that she was getting married. He didn't understand why anyone would get married when they knew they were about to die. I said I thought it was a nice gesture. He then asked me, "If you marry someone and then they die, do you have to get a divorce?"
(Fri 19th Mar 2010, 23:15, More)