b3ta.com user Osiris
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for Osiris:
Profile Info:

Osiris has little information in his profile.
Osiris did *not* get his name from the Matrix film.
Osiris does not do fluffy images.
Osiris spits venom at the deservingly retarded.

Recent front page messages:

morning all....

(Thu 31st Jul 2003, 9:47, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Clients Are Stupid

Paranoia at its finest....
We have this one guy in the office, who would like to think he should be a hotshot web developer and PC repairman. In reality, he's at the bottom of the corporate food chain on the customer service desk. One lazy afternoon I'm at my desk when he appears behind me with a sheepish gape, can't look me in the eye, and asks if we have any new "security devices" installed on the PCs. When I asked him what he meant, he replied with what has become the benchmark for ludicrous IT requests.

"Well, I was typing stuff, and I think I might have typed in something I wasn't supposed to, because all this blue dye started spilling from my keyboard"

I was crippled with inward laughter while trying to keep a poker face and could only reply "no"....obviously his pen had broken, and to this day I'm still amazed at such a cretinous level of moronism, but kind of flattered that he'd reach that conclusion and think I had something to do with it.
(Mon 29th Dec 2003, 11:41, More)

» Clients Are Stupid

our managing director....
....who I guess is one of my clients, as I provide him with my IT skills.....anyway, he has just enough grasp of some technical terms to make him feel as though he knows everything about what I do.

On being told the Exchange (email) server had crashed horribly and would be down for the rest of the day until we fixed it :
"Can't you just copy the hard drive onto another computer?"

On being informed that it would cost £12000 to cable a new office :
"Can't we just take the existing cabling with us?"

I love my job.
(Wed 31st Dec 2003, 12:47, More)