b3ta.com user Angry Pierre
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» Teenage Parties

Tesco
At one party, we decided to pay a drunken visit to tesco at 2am. Host 'G man' climbs into a trolley, wearing only his boxers, and being the good friend I am I push him into the store and promptly leg it.

The trolley hits one of the security scanners by the doors, nearly breaking it, and all the security guard says to G man, whose tackle is now hanging out, is "You can't come in here without a shirt on mate." In a true display of loyalty, everyone else had already legged it down the main road.
(Thu 13th Apr 2006, 14:20, More)

» Well, that taught 'em

Harsh but fair
A few years back on holiday in France with the family, we visited the beach. Out in the sea they had a floating platform for people to dive off. Me and my brother swam out and began diving in, but much to my annoyance some little French twunt kept on diving in every time I surfaced with the intent of splashing me. Wisened up to this, I simply sat down on the platform and waited, in some sort of stand-off with French kid. Eventually, he gave up and dived in, so seeing my chance I jumped after him... and hit him full on as he resurfaced, breaking one of his ribs. Cue lots of screaming, and me making a hasty exit.
(Wed 2nd May 2007, 13:07, More)

» Teenage Parties

Piss
It was two years ago in april, went to a party at a rich friends house. With all the toilets being used, people started relieving themselves outside, as you do, however not usually in such spectacular fashion as one mate who pissed from the balcony straight down into the poor people's barbecue.

Apparently, they used it a couple of weeks later too. Didn't smell too pretty.
(Thu 13th Apr 2006, 12:06, More)

» Well, that taught 'em

Bottled
In town the other week, some kids driving around in a car threw a plastic bottle at us. Nothing serious, but the whole incident left me slightly miffed. Picking up the bottle, I walked around the corner, where said car comes back into view around the one way system. I threw the bottle back into the car through the still open drivers window as it went past, and told them "I think this is yours."
(Thu 26th Apr 2007, 23:23, More)

» Heckles

Not mine, but...
Saw the Tears at Reading last year. As the frontman is introducing the next song, which is about his father who died recently, a voice rings out "Who ate all the pies?" Think I was the only one who laughed.
(Wed 12th Apr 2006, 0:17, More)
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