b3ta.com user Ocarina
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I'm Ocarina. I'm an old-ish b3tan, so I lurk.


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» The Police

Once apon a time I used to hang around with a large group of classical Goths. Corsetry, black lace and costume jewels abound. Anyway, I was not a Goth (I tried it, and just felt silly)and used to wear normalish clothes.
One day we were in the local Goth pub, having a quiet drink. there was about 50 Goths in there, including Kris, who was "head Goth" (pimp cane, top hat, cloak, long hair, gaggle of fat goth girls hanging off him. You know the drill).

A rather burly 30-40 year old man marches in, tattooed like a 5 year old with a set of biros, with a ancient looking woman - bleach blonde with MASSES of makeup on. Polyfilla job, for sure.

Anyway, he marches right up to Kris and WHAM! Smacks him right in the face. Every Goth in the place gets up as one and pretty much beat seven shades out of him. (I don't know why the guy went for Kris, perhaps he thought all the Goths would cry and write poetry instead of kicking the shit out of him).

Not 10 mins later, the guy is lying on the floor and about 4 police vans pull up, and many many officers in full riot gear storm in, body armor, visor and shield. They stop and go to arrest Kris as the hysterical blonde bimbo explains that Kris set apon her boyfriend.
The police look around and see me, sitting in blue jeans, pink frilly blouse on and a vaguely shocked expression on my face.

"Miss, did you see what happened?"
"Yes, officer!"

Needless to say, the burly thug was carted off in handcuffs and I got free drinks all night from the Goths, Yay!
(Thu 22nd Sep 2005, 19:27, More)

» Black Sheep

Im closely related to a certain fuzzy haired, aging rockstar
Who appears on otherwise acceptable comedy quizzes and used to sing an annoying Christmas song.

I dont talk to him since he said "Ya look a bit fat, girl!" to me last Solstice.
(Sat 15th Jan 2005, 21:09, More)

» Lies Your Parents Told You

When I was little, my Dad used to tell me and my litle brother that a friend of his at work "Big Dave" would take me to a naughty boys and girls home and feed me gruel and Id never ever see my famly or friends again, ever!
As you can imagine, this frightened me quite a bit.
A couple of years later, I mustve been nearing my teens, I went to a bonfire party with my dad and we were a queue to get burgers, suddenly my Dad smiled and pointed to the guy standing next to me, a really big tall fella with a big bushy beard and flat cap.
"Hey, thats Big Dave!"
I ran away crying.
(Wed 14th Jan 2004, 17:33, More)

» The last thing that made me cry

I'm changing to a less depressing one.
Last night, watching Star Trek:Generations, at the end when Data found Spot after he thought he died, I had proper cry. *sniff*
Oh, here I go again.. he loved that cat! *sob*

(Tue 19th Apr 2005, 7:17, More)

» My Worst Date

Internet people.
Oh God, it was terrible.
Well, I had a mate on the internet about 2 years ago, and we got along sortof OK. One day he said he had a college interview in my home city and was coming down for the day. Would I like to meet up? Sure.
I get there, and he is in a suit, and has alot of bags with him. I ask him and he said he might stay. I shrugged it off..
Anyway, he thought it would be such a lovely idea if he took me out for dinner.
He was.. the most boring person.. in.. the world.
And had the most nasal high pitched annoying voice.
Highlights were
"Did you know, that they use SOOOO MUCH hydrogen in hydrogen bombs?! Oh yes.. LOADS! Or else how would they be such a big explosion! Heh! Yeahh..."
"Id like to be in the army! Ld like... Blow things up! Yeahhhh... Oh wow. Yeah... Heh.."

And, he stayed for 4 days as he "forgot to book a hotel."
(Fri 22nd Oct 2004, 23:31, More)
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