b3ta.com user somegreybloke
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Update July 2007:I used to write/produce an online comic, War Babies, until I got bored with it not being funny.

Now I mostly do Some Grey Bloke on YouTube.

Recent front page messages:

Ooh, hello b3ta front page!

(Tue 12th Jan 2010, 21:16, More)

made ages ago

but never posted
click for bigger
(Thu 15th Dec 2005, 23:23, More)

Best answers to questions:

» My sex misconceptions

Age 13 or so
a boy at school told me he spent all his pocket money on dildos. I didn't know what he meant, so he laughed at me and called me a spazmo for not knowing what dildos were.

With hindsight, I think he thought that "dildo" was another word for "condom". So who was really the spazmo?

Probably both of us.
(Thu 25th Sep 2008, 16:11, More)

» Personal Ads

If you put
a personal ad on a dating website, you may be surprised to find it on several other websites many years later.

Your situation may have changed. You may no longer be looking for internet-founded romance. You may cringe at some of the things you wrote on your profile all those years ago.

But there is no way to delete them. Because you never joined the site where your profile now sits, splayed out for all the web to see.

I'd like to go back to ten minutes ago, please, when I didn't know all this.
(Thu 13th Sep 2007, 19:06, More)

» Political Correctness Gone Mad

Political Correctness hasn't even started to go mad in Spain
Here in Spain, the little children don't get Christmas presents from Santa but from the Three Kings, who turn up on January 6th. One of the kings (Balthazar) is thought to have been black.

Since there were hardly any black people in Spain until very recent times, in the King's Day processions Balthazar has always been played by a white man painted up like Al Jolson; big red lips, the works.

Immigration is increasing in Spain, and I asked a friend recently if the department stores and offices that organise the Three Kings events have started recruiting actual black people to play the Balthazars.

"Some places did try that," he said, "but it didn't really work. The guys just didn't look black enough."
(Fri 23rd Nov 2007, 9:48, More)

» My Greatest Regrets

Charles Bukowski when I was 19 and thinking: "Aha! So alcholism is the way to become A Great Writer!"

(Thu 5th Oct 2006, 20:31, More)

» Airport Stories

But of course they do.
After getting through security to the departure lounge at New York JFK, I realised I'd forgotten to send any of the postcards in my bag.

I approached a security guard standing near the metal detectors, watching people put their shoes back on after the extensive search. I asked her if there might be a post box on this side of the barrier.

"There are no post boxes in the airport, sir."

"Oh? Why is that?" I asked, aware that we were currently standing in one of the most secure places on the planet.

She looked at me as though I was an idiot.

"People send bombs," she said.

Truth, or hysterical United States paranoiaganda? You be the judge.
(Sat 4th Mar 2006, 13:59, More)
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