b3ta.com user CaptainMonkeyPants
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Ah, hello there.

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» Best Comebacks

This isn't really a verbal comback, no was it really my doing but...
Was driving home yesterday, and overtook a bloke who was hovering between the two lanes approaching an island. On pulling back in front of him he procedded to give it the big'un, honking his horn, and effing and blinding. I ignored the freak, and once he'd picked a lane, he pulled up along-side me, shouting and dishing out dirty looks. So intent on giving me the evil eye, he drove into the back of the car in front of him !!! A man who was built like a bear got out to inspect the damage- I gave a small pip of applause and drove away - I laughed so much.
(Fri 30th Apr 2004, 15:30, More)

» People with Stupid Names

work colleague had to telephone a Mr. Caunt (pronounced cornt)
and what did he say on ringing him "Hello, can i speak to Mr. Cunt please ?, er, no , i mean Caunt. It was a bad way to start the conversation"
(Thu 26th Aug 2004, 13:25, More)

» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

a little while ago now, when Stiltskin were at the height of their one-hit career...
I went to Virgin Megastore after scool to see a very small gig. Got there very early, and ended up stood right at the front - about a couple of feet from the singer (no stage - very small gig). Not being a big fan of the band anyway I was most unimpressed. I stood with a bored-shitless expression, looking at my watch and yawning. (I must have been about 14). After they played i got them to sign my free poster. I specified to the lead singer "Can you sign this for my sister ? - She's in an exam and couldn't make it" I also Yawned at Slipknot when i saw them before they were well-known, one of the band-members waggled his finger at me in a "Don't yawn at our band." kind of a way. I couldn't help it. They were shit.
(Fri 16th Apr 2004, 10:30, More)