b3ta.com user Cockfosters!
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» Breakin' The Law

I once threw a polo off a bridge
onto a police car
(Thu 8th Jan 2004, 18:24, More)

» Teenage Parties

I was always that cunt..
.. who used to steal and break things.

I used to carry various screwdrivers to parties with me.

The most memorable time was when i reduced washing machine to its component parts and spread it around the owners house. (This was fairly easy as my dad used to fix them and id go to work with him for booze money). Later that night I stole every hinge, even ones from kitchen cupboards etc. Ive still got 1 somewhere.

Theres lots more but thats the one im most proud of.
(Sun 16th Apr 2006, 14:54, More)

» School Sports Day

I got banned from doing sports day
I always got roped into doing all the races nobody else wanted to, as a result I did most of the races on the day and wasn't very good. However, when we finished the race we would go and sit down on chairs in the order we had finished. In the confusion I would sit my self down on the 1st, 2nd or 3rd chairs. This worked suprisingly well and my form won one year becuase of me. They eventually did get privvy to the scheme and i had to spend the year 11 sports day in silence with the vice principle in her office.

Now you can have a PE story. I was never that good at PE (but i wasnt one of the fat kids that would get their mum to write them a note every fucking lesson) and my classmates knew this. We were playing softball and one gobshite shouts "Cockfosters is batting, field in". Not only did i twat the ball off the field, as i ran i launched my bat and hit him sqaure in the bollocks. He didnt walk right for about a month.
(Mon 3rd Apr 2006, 1:46, More)

» Old People Talk Bollocks

My old person calls the remote
the tit
(Thu 11th Mar 2004, 15:48, More)

» Impromptu Games You Play

Spot the secret agent
we played that in windsor castle.
The true amount became aparent when my friend set the fire alarm off.

Just thought of another. Its cleverly titled 'Penis'. The object of the game is to shout penis louder than the last person. The winner is the person who submits last. This game is best played in crowded public places.
(Mon 29th Mar 2004, 15:56, More)
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