b3ta.com user what_bus
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» Messing with the Dark Side

Ghosts in the circuit box...
My mates at Uni have the ridiculous good luck to live with a selection of the finest girls from the netball team. Not only is this great for idle evenings when there's nothing to watch on TV, but the girls are also notoriously gullible, and very easily scared.

Cue a selection of ghostly pranks, each more stupid than the last.
The best one however, was when one of my mates gathered the ladies up, and told them to come upstairs became Liam had something to show them. Liam's door is closed, so they assume he's waiting inside with something fantastic to show them. Suddenly, all the lights go out. Cue much faffing about and explanations that none of the boys know where the fuse box is. So the girls grab a torch and head down to the cellar to switch the lights back on.
And, you guessed it, just as they open the cupboard the fuse box is is, out jumps Liam, dressed entirely in white haz-mat overalls with a blank white face mask on, screaming at the top of his lungs.
I think there was actual urination.
(Fri 21st Apr 2006, 13:21, More)

» Worst Nicknames Ever

French Bastard...
We all thought my mate Will lookes a bit like Will Shakespeare, so we always used to call him that. Then, someone pointed out that he was less Will Shakespeare, more French Pornographer.
And because we didn't want to give him the credit of being anything to do with porn, he just became French.
So now everyone calls him Frenchy, you see somethng French you throw it at him, ringing him up and pretending to be his long lost father the King of France, and so on and so forth.
It's gotten so out of hand that we threw a French party for him for his birthday, complete with a French buffet of baggettes and brie and all the french fancies he can eat.

He's never even been to France.
(Sat 20th May 2006, 18:14, More)

» People with Stupid Names

One of my friends..
went for a job and was interviewed by a chraming woman named Gaye Macbeth.
Which I found hilarious.

Oh, and the guy who does the score on Buffy is called Brian Wankum.
Tee hee.
(Thu 26th Aug 2004, 11:39, More)

» Local Nutters

There's a guy near me who rides the bus to Cambridge every day, and comes back stinking drunk on the last bus every night. Rumour has it he won the lottery, and spends all his money on drink and drugs.
Once he told me that if he was trapped on a mountainside he'd only hope that he had a jar of pickles with him, so that he could roll down on it to safety.
(Fri 17th Sep 2004, 9:18, More)

» Shit Stories

I went on holiday to Greece once with some mates and drank a lot of Blue Curico, or something like that, which began to turn my shit green. I didn't say anything though, because I figured it was just me. Luckily, it turned out that everyone was, as my friend put it, getting a visit from the Hulk Craps.
(Thu 6th May 2004, 10:04, More)
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