» Thrown away: The stuff you loved and lost.

Lost and found
A happy story (in the end) for you all.

I'm about 7 or 8 and my mum's Morris Traveller had to go into the garage. But the only garage that would take it was two bus rides away. So mum picked me up from school and we got on the bus to go and collect the car.

We get home and I realise that I no longer have my lunchbox with me. This is especially distressing as we had all been given sweets and prizes that day, all of which were in the lunchbox. We summise that I must have left it on the bus and I cry myself to sleep.

The next morning I wake up and go downstairs. As I enter the back room, there is my lunchbox with all it's contents plus a basket of girly stuff like cream and makeup and a note from the fairies saying they found my lunchbox and returned it to me with a special gift because I'm such a special girl.

I believed this until I was told by my sister some months later that my dad had gone to the bus depot when mum told him about what happened and collected the lunchbox from lost property, gone and bought the basket of goodies and written the note that went with it.
(Fri 15th Aug 2008, 12:38, More)

» I Drank Meths (pointless teenage things you did to shock)

Sex
I didn't actually do it to shock. I was (still am) with the right guy at the right time. But my mum found out and tore me a new one. Wouldn't let me go out. When I was out I was on a curfew.

8 years later and she's mellowed to the idea (even "allowed" me to buy a house with him). However, was going through old family photos and found my parent's wedding photo. There I am. 6 Months old. Front and center!

Cheeky Funkster!
(Thu 19th Jul 2007, 13:08, More)

» Why should you be fired from your job?

Apparently I should be fired for having an A Level exam to go to.
I worked part-time as a freezer monkey for a shop that shall be known as Weight-roose while I was at College.

A tnuc called Craig pulled a chair out from under me when I went to sit down and damaged my back so I couldn't go into work (doctors note and everything). Didn't stop them from putting me on a written warning for taking too much time off!

But then exam time came. I took A Level drama as a cruise through course. A Level drama exams take place at night so I had to book time off work to do it. Went to my manager and she point blank refused. She didn't believe that exams took place in the evening. I could have offered my tutor's number to provide confirmation. I could have provided witnesses to the fact that I had an exam. But to be honest, the shitty situation where they put me on a warning for having a damaged back, shutting me in the freezer while I'm stocking a trolley and forgetting to put me on the lunch list when I had turned up at 5am for a stocktake (therefore having to survive the rest of the shift on a Mars bar as I had no money on me) took the piss.

I quit before they had a chance to fire me for not turning up. And I didn't turn up for my two weeks notice either.
(Mon 13th Aug 2007, 15:37, More)

» Running away

Crawling away
I don't remember this but have had it recounted to me many, many times.

We have a long back garden with a garage that runs the length of it. There is a gap that a person can squeeze through between said garage and next door's garage but it's overgrown with thistles and weeds so it's impassable - or so my parent's thought.

My mum was busy preparing dinner when the doorbell goes. She answers the door to find this man standing there with her baby girl saying
"Is this yours?". Somehow her baby which had been playing happily in the back garden had crawled between the two garages, over weeds and thistles, up the driveway and into the middle of the road whereupon a bloke driving along the road has seen the baby, stopped and gone around the houses trying to find the parents.

Then there was the time I fell asleep in my toybox with the lid down for a few hours. The house is searched, up and down the road neighbours are looking for me and the police are about to be called when I emerge none the wiser. OK I didn't actually run away but everyone thought I did!

I say to you what I said to my ex boyfriend. "Length? There's barely anything there!"
(Fri 11th Aug 2006, 14:36, More)

» Never Meet Your Heroes

College
To my shame I had never been to the National Theatre before I was 17. So it's a College trip to see some rubbish or other as part of my drama course. Myself and 4 friends decided to go together. We left the wrong entrance at Embankment and instead of walking over the conveniently placed bridge we ended up walking down to the next bridge. We cross said bridge and now have no idea where to go. So my friend Hayley decides to wander up to the first person she sees and ask them for directions. She approaches a group of older men who by all accounts are very apologetic but they don't know where the NT is either. It's only when she walks back to the group and I take another look that I realise she's just asked the Archbishop of Canterbury where the NT is!
(Tue 30th May 2006, 16:56, More)