b3ta.com user TheHorseWithSteelFrame
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» Guilty Pleasures

Horses' ears. They have a surprisingly satisfying feeling when you press them down and they flick back. :) Some horses have better ears for this than others.

Worth checking if the horse is likely to bite your arm off before attempting this.
(Thu 7th Apr 2005, 15:11, More)

» Best Films Ever

Top Gun
end of QOTW.
(Thu 17th Jul 2008, 16:31, More)

» Strict Parents

My parents were ok.
They told me I wasn't allowed a car until I'd spent some time on a motorbike to make me more aware.

(Sun 11th Mar 2007, 18:22, More)

» School Sports Day

Sorry for this
Parmesan: Wilson's. HAS to be.
(Thu 30th Mar 2006, 20:29, More)

» Your Weirdest Teacher

A few from my high school.
Stansfeld: Languages "teacher". Those who know him, know what I mean.

He was constantly shaking ever so slightly, and when roused into anger by such heinous crimes as Staring Out The Window, would send you outside then follow in short order to administer an earbashing and dose of severe halitosis. An effective punishment if not exactly for the reasons he thought it was.

He also had VERY greasy hair, passed into legend by typically childish humour using "gras" (french for grease) in every conceivable sentence. Oh, and once took us halfway across Paris on a school trip at a quick-march pace only to find the sodding insides-on-the-outside building was shut. He really thought he was something special, couldn't understand why no-one took him seriously.

Mr. Carter: Short-lived RE teacher, had an air of the vicarly about him - not sure if he actually was one. Said "Right boys" a lot, myself and a friend counted 43 incidents in a 35 minute period once.

Mrs. Rowat: English teacher, scottish, presumed lesbian (with some rumoured corroborating stories). Myself and a friend (may have been the same one, oddly enough) worked out when her time of the month was, and invariably got away with 3 out of 4 weeks' slacking when others copped an earful for it.

Mrs. Bartlett: IT/Maths "teacher". Seriously, seriously misplaced. Easily baffled and taught by reading what the textbook said - replied "look up the answers" if asked a question.

Mrs. Stockton: Fat fuck of a teacher, all the personality of a dead marmoset - once caught a lad eating a pork pie and asked "Is that a PIIIIEEEEEEEE?" with such enthusiasm (apparently at the thought of confiscating and eating, one would have thought) that this phrase passed into the repertoire of basic insults at the school - choruses of PIIIIIEEEE were heard whenever she passed.

There were more, but I'll put them up if I can be arsed later.
(Sat 12th Nov 2005, 14:50, More)
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