» Shoplifting

I wish I knew who found it...
When I was probably about 5 years old, I was in the Early Learning Centre happily admiring the sheer number of plastic toy animals on display that were so popular amongst the 5 year olds of the time. When my mum told me we had to go, I knew I just had to have one. So I quickly placed one of the small rather lifelike plastic lizards into my pocket.

As soon as I was out the door I knew the police had been informed and would soon put me away.

I had to get rid of the evidence!

So in the next shop I had to placed my new friend where noone would ever find it. Unfortunately my mum had dragged me into the underwear section of Debenhams.

I reached into my pocket, wrapped my fingers around the life like looking lizard and shoved my hand it deep inside a pile of big cheap granny pants.

Only on my way home did I realise that giving old Gertie her second heart attack in as many weeks probably means more jailtime than stealing a plastic lizard.

I haven't had the stomach to steal anything else since that day!
(Fri 11th Jan 2008, 14:38, More)