b3ta.com user The Insidious Dr Mayhem
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» Accidental animal cruelty

Just like osok
Although it was the A68 at one of its hillier sections. Travelling up and over one of the 'if you go over 30 you will take off' hills a bunch of crows took off from the road in front of me. Unfortunately for them, so did I and collected one in the radiator.
The wind held it there and for a while I could see a wing tip and two feet over the front of my bonnet, until I came to a village and had to slow. Ah well - poor bird.
Travelling through said village various locals turned to gawk, so after a bit I stopped, assuming some major damage at the front of the car.

No damage to the car, unless you count the cooked brains of a crow splattered across my radiator. The crow was still there though, and took an awful lot of pulling to extract the mangled carcass from the car.

Smelled for days!!!
(Mon 10th Dec 2007, 21:35, More)

» Airport Stories

long distance
I went through secondary school in the north of scotland while my parents moved to the Falklands for a bit. Although I had a guardian appointed (top guy who lived in a pyramid) at major holidays I used to fly out. As you might imagine, a stroppy hungover goth/metal teenager turning up at RAF Brize Norton after too many hours on trains and at Cheltenham station, covered in leather and chains, and possibly smelling of whatever was smoked nearby at recent parties really attracts the attention of the RAF guards. Cue removal of all metal...that can take a while, as there were bangles, studs, dog tags, keys, chains, assorted junk.

Still - once on the planes things always went well, as they were leased from BA, and prepared for a full complement of passengers. One of thse flights had only 7 of us...but we did our best to consume all the provided drinks anyway during the 9000-odd mile trip!
(Mon 6th Mar 2006, 14:32, More)

» Claims to Fame

My claims to fame
When they opened Mount Pleasant airport in the Falklands, me and my kid brother built the model 747 which slid down a wire at the opening ceremony. Painting on the BA logo took ages!

Sat behind Kylie's boyfriend at the Event Horizon premiere in Edinburgh, hairy, vest wearing type that he was. My brother was luckier - he was behind Kylie, and the jumper on the back of her seat fell down between his legs...

Oh and my wife looked after Bez when he was in Edinburgh Royal Infirmary for a bit - says he's really nice:-)

Oh and does having a Douglas Adams signed special edition HHGTTG count - or am I just being a pain in the neck now?
(Mon 28th Feb 2005, 22:19, More)