b3ta.com user Druid
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GNAAH! Look at these LOVELY T-shirts! You can even get the designs on mugs and bags and stuff too.

You can design your own too. Imagine that.
NOTE: If you want a Powercuff shirt, give me a gaz and I can get you one cheaper than they appear on the website

Recent front page messages:

An idea I had today

(Mon 16th May 2005, 22:05, More)

Best answers to questions:

» When animals attack...

Not really being attacked by an animal,
but a friend and I were walking through the city centre, and as usual the pigeons were pecking around for scraps of food. We started talking about how the pigeons always moved out of the way as you approached, even if they were facing the other way.

To prove this was the case, my friend said "They always see you coming, watch this.", calmly walked up to the nearest pigeon, brought his leg back and kicked it squarely a full 10 yards across the street.

Passers by were stunned. So was I, I would have put money on the pigeon moving out of the way.
(Sat 4th Jun 2005, 12:14, More)

» When I met the parents

On meeting a girlfriend's parents for the first time
I was asked by her broad Yorkshire accented ex-quarryman dad:

"'Ere, you're a bloke. What do you do for itchy balls? I've tried everything: TCP, udder cream.." (What the hell is udder cream?)

Not wanting to seem shocked, I simply asked if he'd tried washing them.
(Mon 23rd May 2005, 23:21, More)

» Teenage Parties

I went to a party once.
It was ace. Nobody knew I was there, but I got a picture of Mykeyboy in the nip, and I also got one of Benny Tied To A Tree doing a toilet.
(Wed 19th Apr 2006, 21:24, More)

» Pure Ignorance

Wrong on so many counts!
My ex-girlfriend was working in a sandwich shop at the time, and this clanger came from her *ahem* manager.

'Twas near the 14th of February, and the manager told my girlfriend "This week's Valentine special is going to be a ciabatta sandwich, Vienesse finger and hot chocolate", to which my girlfriend looked confused and asked why. The reply?

"It's all Italian, isn't it! And Italian is the language of love."

Nice going. Offending the Austrians, Italians and French in one go.

Another one which was all wrong, the same girl's mother was seen in town pushing a small child she was looking after in a pushchair. A woman looked at the baby, then at the minder - and commented that "Your mother would have been so proud!"

*Not* her daughter, and her mother was still very much alive.
(Tue 11th Jan 2005, 0:42, More)