b3ta.com user Lizzle
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for Lizzle:
Profile Info:


Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» It was a great holiday, but...

Naked Islamic sleepwalking
Mr Lizzle sleepwalks. Usually, if he gets out of our bed in the night, the movement wakes me up and I can usually calm him down and get him back to bed. It is, therefore, unfortunate that on a visit to Malaysia, we chose a hotel next to a mosque with rooms whose doors opened into a sort of open air corridor, with views for miles around.

The rooms only had twin beds, so when he got up, I didn't notice it. In his sleepwalking state, he became convinced that he was in the wrong room, with the wrong wife, and scarpered, naked, outside, locking himself out in the Islamic night.

After wandering around a bit, then becoming paranoid and spending a nervous quarter hour crouching in a bush, being bitten on the bits by mosquitos, he tried a cautious knock on the door he had come out of. I woke up and let him in - he, still unconvinced I was his wife (bless him - he often fails to wake up completely from these episodes), had to be taken into the bathroom and shown his sponge bag and favourite shaving gel before he would accept it was really his room, that we were really married and that it was four in the bloody morning and I really needed some sleep.

I love him really.
(Sat 23rd Apr 2005, 11:02, More)

» Pure Ignorance

I'm an editor. A couple of years ago, I received a CV, which announced in lovely, shiny big letters that the writer was:

'An experienced and excellent poofreader'.

Hur hur.
(Thu 13th Jan 2005, 19:27, More)

» Birthdays

Sobbed all day
Woke up on my 23rd birthday to find my wonderful Grandma had died in the night. Opened her card. It just said 'Love you, darling; have a lovely life'.
(Sun 11th Dec 2005, 16:40, More)