b3ta.com user badgertastic
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Not very good at potatoshop, but have posted this:

Sebastian was in denial

Oh, and this:
Sebastian's new look was working wonders with the ladies

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Best answers to questions:

» Old People Talk Bollocks

My granny is a champion bollocks talker.
One of her best was the time she announced to my younger brother, who at the time was a huge wrestling fan, that Hulk Hogan, no less (at the height of his fame) had been present at the opening of the Bushey Agricultural Fair. We pointed out that is was unlikely they could afford him, and showed her a picture of Hulk Hogan. "That's him, dear", she insisted. I think we can safely assume it wasn't.

On another occasion, I was in a shopping centre with her, we went back to the car and it wouldn't start, so we went to the shopping centre information desk, who told her where to find the emergency telephone, and also the red "push to talk" button on the payment machines, if she needed to summon help from the car park. We went back the car park, and had been wandering around for about ten minutes, passing the emergency telephone more than once, as well as the payment machines, before I asked her what she was looking for. "I'm looking for a red telephone, dear". I was ten, and it's still the only time I've shouted at my grandmother.
(Thu 11th Mar 2004, 15:47, More)

» Claims to Fame

Oh yes...
My Mum and I were in Waitrose car park, and Harry Enfield came up and asked us if we had any jump leads. We didn't. He was taller than you'd think.
(Mon 28th Feb 2005, 23:33, More)

» Claims to Fame

This is particularly tenuous and awful
but my Dad was in the same class at school as Alvin Stardust.
(Fri 25th Feb 2005, 9:42, More)

» Pure Ignorance

A couple
both, it must be said, Americans.

1) Accosted outside the entrance to the Botanical Gardens in Oxford, about five feet away from the sign which advertises that it is, in fact the Botanical Gardens, by an American couple asking me, in complete seriousness, "Can you tell us how to get to the Botanical Gardens?".

2) Overheard, in Oxford's High Street, a fellow local being asked by an American couple, "excuse me, could you tell us how to get to Oxbridge please?". I don't think telling them to work hard in their A-Levels would have helped: they were very definitely asking directions...
(Wed 12th Jan 2005, 21:58, More)

» Childhood bad taste

The first album I ever bought?
That fine debut by the sack-trousered master of spacker-dancing, M.C. Hammer.

I really liked it too.
(Sun 12th Dec 2004, 14:35, More)
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