b3ta.com user Lord Gibbon
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I'm a smelly student, so I spend my time leeching off your hard-earned tax. Ha.

That is all.

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» My Worst Vomit

not me my brother, and written by him
One day a few years ago i was drinking away at a party and we ran out of sensible things to drink, so began making strange cocktails out of say ketchup and vodka (not good) and guinness and say mayo (not good, not good at all). So eventually my mate says whos going to drink some washing up liquid then? i hear some one shout "only if you mix it with vodka!" i realised it was me that said it right after i did. oh dear. so my mate being the mate he is, pretended to put vodka in and i downed a reasonable 3 or 4 fingers of yellow goo. "feeling fine" i belched. after about half an hour, belly quivering and shaking like an earth quake, i fought my way to the kichen sink and barfed like ive never barfed before. i remember someone saying "look hes throwing up bubbles" and me shouting "piss off, im not" just as i blew a good 2 inch bubble out my nose. mmmm chunky bubble filled sink. turns out washing up liquid is a laxative too and it turns you guts to greased lightning. im acually feeling sick just remembering this. a good time all round i feel.
(Sun 22nd Aug 2004, 12:31, More)

» Stuff You've Overheard

In school a while back...
In physics lesson, we were being taught about properties of solids, and some guy pipes up "So does that mean jelly is elastic?".

teacher says, "Actually it's brittle."
Student "But doesn't it depend on what kind of jelly it is?"
Teacher "What other kinds of jelly are there?"

Clue class suddenly goes silent as always happens whenever someone says something amusing, a mate leans over to me and says quite loudly (note: all boys school)
Class proceeds to piss themselves laughing.
(Thu 10th Jun 2004, 12:10, More)