» Clients Are Stupid

My trials and tribulations
I worked in a pub for a few years and had quite a number of stupid (and drunken customers) Some of the highlights were:

I was walking past a table of snooty travel agents (all women) who were enjoying some of our fine fayre . One of their number grabbed me (even though my arms were fully loaded with plates) and asked me if I had any special sauce. I smiled at her and said " I do, but it's not on the menu love". I winked and walked away.

I had a German customer come in and he seemed very bemused at the fact the pub was not also a bureau de change, despite my constant asuurances that we weren't, plus me directing him to the bureau just down the road.

I also had this conversation.
"Hello, (name of pub omitted)"
"hi, do you wrap jewellery?"
"no, we're a pub"
"so you don't wrap jewellery then?"
Muppet.
(Thu 1st Jan 2004, 23:37, More)

» My Worst Date

this was one of my less successful dates....
My mate at the time had set me up with a "blind date" so he could take his girlfriend out. The blind date was the girlfriend's mate and apparently was "really looking forward to it".
I turned up, not expecting much, but my God - she was hideous! Made Anne Widdecombe look like Rachel Stevens. Undaunted, and buoyed on by the kudos gained by "falling on the grenade", we went into the cinema for our double date to see Pretty Woman. Unfortunatley, I missed out on that fine film, as the bastard Nazi cinema staff decided I didn't look fifteen and couldn't get in.

The looks of pity from the others as they went in without me haunt me to this day. Still, at least I didn't have to entertain the minger.
(Sun 24th Oct 2004, 23:58, More)