b3ta.com user Hoohah
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Move along, move along.

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» Clients Are Stupid

Damned Pranksters
Didn't happen to me but a friend, who was working in IT. She got a call from a user complaining about a broken mouse, that the pointer wasn't moving properly when the mouse was.
Her: It probably just needs cleaning, open the mouse up.
User: I can't get the buttons off!
Her: Turn it upside down and remove the circular panel-
User (interrupting): Oh some joker has stuck a bouncy ball in here. Cheers *hangs up*
(Fri 2nd Jan 2004, 3:08, More)

» Claims to Fame

My friend's mum is Terry Pratchett's dentist
Given my friend is obsessed with Discworld she was very pleased when he had toothache as it gave her the opportunity to shout "My mum's pulled things out of Terry Pratchett's orifice!" at great volume.
There are a few other more direct ones -- I had a trick done on me by Derren Brown, my dad made a lovably crap joke in front of Ross Noble, a family friend's dad went to school with Timmy Mallet, my mum hung out with the Osmonds -- but none with such promise for orifice-based humour.
(Thu 24th Feb 2005, 22:39, More)

» The Weird Kid In Class

I was a bit weird.
In primary school I cried and had someone sent to the deputy head's office because they broke my mobius strip.
And I used to fall asleep in the art cupboard.
(Sun 21st Jan 2007, 14:51, More)

» Where is the strangest place you have slept?

On the keyboard lid of an upright piano.
Enough said really.
(Mon 1st Jan 2007, 14:20, More)