b3ta.com user Spicer
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» Lies Your Parents Told You

Back in the olden days...
...when I were little, I used to LOVE having baths. So much so, in fact that I hated getting out of the water and would complain vociferously through the medium of hysterical weeping. This quite rightly narked my folks off good and proper so they told me that a monstrous beasty called Tommy Splodger lived down the plughole and he'd come out and eat me if I didn't get out by the time the water ran out of the bath. The gurgle of draining water was Tommy slurping it down eager to get a taste of me! Thenceforth, my exasperated folks had more problems getting me into the bath than out of it due to my terror at being devoured by the drain dwelling Mr Splodger.
(Wed 14th Jan 2004, 14:22, More)

» Pet Names

Had a cat...
called Oscar. Not very funny. Next was called Bafta. Brilliant. Not sure the next one'll be called Golden Globe however.
(Wed 25th Feb 2004, 17:13, More)