» Lies Your Parents Told You

My dad was full of gems of sadistic parenting
Because of him I beleved up till an embarrassingly late point in kiddiehood that every electricity pylon we drove past was the eiffel tower, and that The Body Shop was some kind of macabre emporium at which to stock up on brains, bones, blood etc. Oh, and that he'd murdered lots of people.

Perhaps the most eevil though came when, on holiday in france, i got a particularly nasty cold a few days b4 we were due to fly home. My lovely concerned daddy convinced me that if the cold hadnt gone by the day of the flight, my head would almost certainly explode on the plane. He'd seen it happen many a time b4, he insisted, and wasn't prepared to get snot all over his jacket again. I nearly shat meself when i woke up still snuffly on the day of the flight...
(Mon 19th Jan 2004, 10:16, More)