b3ta.com user Victor Von Richter
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» Lies Your Parents Told You

canine pharmaceuticals
When I was 6, I got bitten by an aphid or a ladybird or something. My cousin told me the only cure was to eat dog biscuits. I was a fat, omniverous child too - so unfair.

When I was pushing 19, my family was having a discussion about childhood pets, specifically my rabbit - 'Bill'. "You do realise Bill was a girl rabbit, don't you?" says Mum, as the rest of the family nod conspiratorially. "We didn't want to tell you in case you got upset."
So to my ex-girlfriends, it's not my fault. Relational issues? THEY TOLD ME SHE WAS A BOY!

PostScript: 'Bill' didn't "go up to rabbit heaven peacefully in his/her sleep". The poor, androgenous bunny contracted an infection that ate its genitals.
(Tue 20th Jan 2004, 20:18, More)