b3ta.com user vladimir
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Profile for vladimir:
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a misery-machine that runs on attention




feel free to add in thoughts on the future to the above thread

fluorescent heads and four billion teeth and eyes

contents of message 7678787 I salute you

o time thy pyramints

Recent front page messages:

poor angela she's had to do some explaining

(Sun 29th Jan 2017, 23:10, More)

fixed that for you

(Sat 25th Jun 2016, 15:33, More)

one day she'll snap, and kill him. until then, the only thing to do is consult the
and kill him. until then the only thing to do is consult the
(Fri 1st May 2015, 16:30, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Impulse buys

I must admit that I do have a bit of a tendency to impulse buy, because of my busy and complicated life, and over the last few years, I've purchased various items for my home, just on a whim! These include chandeliers, several flat screen TVs, some lovely hanging baskets, a massage chair (just couldn't resist - highly recommended!) and even a little floating house for the ducks on my pond! I must admit though that I have a great employer and I can generally cover most of these purchases under a very lenient expenses system. What could possibly go wrong?
(Thu 21st May 2009, 14:22, More)

» The Weird Kid In Class

Think of the internet as a class.
There are clever smug hard-workers who always do well and everyone else hates (www.bbc.co.uk), tough kids who just make trouble and everyone is scared of (www.cia.gov), and sexy but rather dim girls who spend their time combing their hair and giggling (www.sex.etc). The weird kid in the corner, dressed in a T-shirt with a skull on it, who has a collection of dead beetles in his desk drawer, who once pierced his own ears at breaktime, who fantasises about shooting all of his classmates, well, that’s obviously www.b3ta.com.
(Fri 19th Jan 2007, 10:57, More)

» Intense Friendships

Intense friend

My imaginary friend was fun at first, but gradually he got really possessive and sulked when I played with some of my other imaginary friends. Then he started spreading really mean stories about me and in the end he used to hang around outside my house, just sort of staring. It was the imaginary hate-mail that really hurt though - blank pages. You can imagine.
(Fri 28th Jul 2006, 13:00, More)

» Old stuff I still know

I can ride a penny farthing
I can add up three and six
I can catch a bus in Worthing
I can whittle brittle sticks

I can hold a door politely
For a lady to pass through
I can correspond fortnightly
I have good posture on a pew

I know that I mustn’t grumble
I can signal in morse code
I prefer an apple crumble
I give way upon the road

I know how to spell correctly
And can’t abide a sloppy hand
I’ll look you in the eye directly
And say I do love a brass band

I renovate my vintage motor
Each weekend I work twelve hours flat
I don’t know what I do it all for
I really am a massive twat
(Thu 30th Jun 2011, 17:41, More)

» Famous people I hate

I just can't stand that Marcel Proust. Why? It's a long story.
(Thu 4th Feb 2010, 17:25, More)
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